Talk About It

I have always been so glad that the majority of our One Tree Hill audience was young women.  I wanted to use this space as a place where you can write in for advice on being a girl!  Post your questions here in comment and I'll try to pick one every week to address.


Xoxo! BJL

205 comments:

  1. Hello Joy! Thank you for doing that, this is a good way to be closer to your fans and for girls, have a real woman (and wonderful mother btw) that can advice us.

    I think one of the questions that often come back & all the girls are mainly concerned is the question about confidence. You have a lovely career behind you, you enormously evolved and get a lot of confidence with all these years (yes, I follow you since more than ten years now).

    I think one of the questions that often come back & all the girls are mainly concerned. You have a lovely career behind you, you enormously evolved and get a lot of confidence with all these years (yes, I follow you since more than ten years now).

    So, do you have any advice about gaining a little more confidence, believing in yourself and being able to change things?

    I think we all have a period or we ask questions, we wonder if we're good enough to do that. Do you have any tips for that we get a little more to believe in yourself?

    Thank you again,
    Send you all my love in this beautiful holiday season.

    - Stéphanie

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    1. Hi stephanie,
      when I opened this blog today and looked at it and the way it has been here for quite some time I feel the need to share with you something I learnt a couple of weeks back.
      confidence is something that everyone has, its there in a lil room in your heart and the only problem is that it gets intimidated really fast.
      Whenevr you feel Low or not "GOOD ENOUGH" just think that If you are not good enough for it, who else can be!! Some part of u will push you towards facing ur circumstances. and when you achieve it you have to remember, If you could do it so can everyone else! :)

      About felling good, satisfied and fulfilled! well frankly that comes only a sometimes in life and the whole point of it is to move on and chase it! the THRILL OF A CHASE can beat everything.

      BELIEVE, DREAM , ACHIEVE
      Be who you are and the only person can push you hard enough is only YOU

      Have a good time and hope this helped even in a tiny possible way!

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  2. Hi, thanks for doing this, it's really nice to answer to our questions.

    Like you Christmas season is one of my favourite.

    So, how will be your Chtrimas tree decorated?

    Much love from France. xoxoxo

    Sosso

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  3. Hello, Joy! Welcome back!
    I have a problem. Music is my life, and I like singing very much. I am doing it very well. A lot of people tell me that.. but my best friends ask me to fall silent then I'm singing near of them. I can't stop doing it. Music helps me to stay strong. I recently recorded my first video. A lot of my acquaintances told me that it was great! Honestly... I don't care about it. It was sad that my best friends weren't happy for me. It was important step in my life, and they didn't support me. My family members are proud of me, but in their opinion musician - is not a profession. So... I can't sing when I'm home; I can't sing when I'm with my friends. I can sing when I'm alone. This is the only way. What happened? Everything was fine... but now... Maybe they just don't believe in me anymore?! I don't know what to do... I'm verry strong person, but now I'm stumped.
    I hope for your help. Thank you in advance. =)

    P.S. I apologize for errors in my post. (I don't speak english very vell).

    -Jane

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  5. This is a wonderful section.

    I do have a question about something I've been struggling with for quite some time now: I'm very, very insecure about my legs (especially my calves and knees) and I can't wear relatively short skirts or dresses at all because of it. This bothers me greatly because there's nothing better than wearing a nice, comfortable dress in the summer. Does anyone here have any idea on how I could work on this? Thanks.

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    1. Hi JaneS,
      When I read your comment, I immediately thought "oh my gosh, I know exactly how you feel!" I have always hated my legs, especially after the photographer who I paid to take my high school senior year pictures told me my knees looked like potatoes as he tried to cleverly position/cover them for my pictures. =( Didn't exactly boost my confidence as a teenager.
      I have pretty big knees and short legs, mainly between my knees and ankles, and kind of large calves for those proportions.
      I wish I could tell you I had some great ideas, but all I've found was that they look better when when are a little tan in the summer, and I try to keep them in shape as much as possible. I often prefer to cover up my legs with long dresses like maxi dresses in the summer on days when I am feeling particularly critical.
      For the most part, I've come to accept that these are the legs that I was given, and I just remind myself that if I had been born with great legs, I'd probably have bad hair or something else to be insecure about! I think we all notice our less-than-desirable physical traits more than anyone else, and we make ourselves feel bad about them far more than we should.
      Don't let it stop you from wearing cute dresses in the summer!

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    2. Dear BJL, One Tree Hill changed my life. It made me think of myself, my future, my dreams, my goals, my life and who I am and who I want to be. It's true that I don't want to be anything other than me. But who is me? It takes a while to figure one's self out and to wonder as to where you'll be and who'll be with you in the end. The show changes so dynamically from season to season and character to character and I have come to realize that changes like those aren't all fiction they do indeed persist in reality. The journey of one's self starts with understanding one's self but why can't I see what I want to see in myself? Why can't I be who I want to be? It's a nagging doubt and question that pertains constantly and a question that I no longer can answer, a doubt that I no longer can address and now it has turned into a mirage because a mirage is not only a blurry vision, it is also a straight line of view with no horizon, no ending and a blur of something you want to see. I don't really have a question I want you or anyone to answer neither do I have a problem that needs attendance; I just have hope. And I want to know if anyone has that hope too.

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  6. I'm a 15 year old teenager who are struggling and can't find my place in the world, I really don't know how I'm supposed to do that either. I feel like.. why am I living when I'm not living for something special, I mean yeah I've got a good family and some good friends but I don't think that's enough? I want something to burn for.. Something special, and not just being this invisible girl who go home right after school. I wanna find myself, not just live by the others rules..
    Please, give me some advice on this, how can I find my own way?

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    1. You're not the only one who feeels like this! there are other girls out there too, trust me :)

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    2. You sound a lot like me at 15. A good family and some good friends are very hard to come by so don't take those people for granted because someday they might not be there.

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    3. I feel that the only way to feel worthy and to find your personal calling in life is to love the person that made you. I call him my loving father, but others call God/Jesus. I believe that Jesus gave his whole life so that we can have a relationship with the only man he knows can save us. God is the only person with whom I find strength, purpose and guidance, and I whole-heartedly believe that he is the only way that anyone can feel complete. I obviously don't know what you've been through in your life but I know that I have personally really struggled with many things and I have only found worth in my heavenly father as he is the only one that can fill the voids I had needed to be filled for so long. He is my savior and I really pray that you find your purpose in life, if not through God through something else as I know that no matter what you deserve to feel loved and to have a purpose in your life as I also have amazing friends and family but you need more than that. god bless xxx

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    4. Just so you know, you aren't the only one that feels this way! I'm 33 and still trying to decide what I want my life to look like and what is important to me. I am not quite sure I have found my place in the world either.

      You are brave and smart to start thinking about these things at 15! I encourage you to try things (even if they are out of your comfort zone), love all of those special people in your life, and enjoy each minute. I think you'll find your way. :)

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    6. Gosh... I am 16. And when I have moments like this, I always reread one speech. It is famed "Sunscreen".
      Just take a look and it will get better. It always make sense to me. You can find it here:
      http://slave-of-dave.blogspot.com/2012/12/wear-sunscreen-or-advice-like-youth.html

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    7. I was 15 once too and it was tough. You have to remember there is alot out there and your just starting out in life. Don't rush things, enjoy the here and now. Give thanks for what you have. Try not to dwell on the things that have not come to you yet. Your burn will come to you when its ready, don't rush it. Things will all fall in place, just give it time.

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    8. Ditto what Emily Louise said!

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    9. Honey, I am much older than you are and I am still trying to find my place in the world. It is a journey I am looking forward to it. At your age I wanted to breeze through life, a bit too soon, and now that I am older, I feel that I missed out on very important years of life. Just being a kid, a teenager. I was so focused on finding who I was, that I forgot to enjoy myself, enjoy life. It is not exact how you can find yourself, or find what makes your fire burn so to speak. You just have to live and don't be afraid to try new things and new experiences. So that you may be able to find what exactly makes you burn with passion. Live, don't be afraid, try everything, until one day you'll realize you have a strong passion for something, and you work your way up from there, fight for your dreams. And enjoy every step of the way. And trust me when I say this dear, through dark times you must remember "it will not last forever." Most importantly, believe and trust in God because no matter what happens, his plan is bigger than our minds can understand. But one day, all that we go through will make sense. Good luck to you dear.

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  7. I have been sitting here trying to write something for over a hour. I don't know how to put everything in to words, this should be easy for me, I am always writing something. It might be because I have a problem being open.

    Hiding is what I tend to do the most. That might be because I have always been invisible to the people around me. My mom doesn't come around much, my dad cares more about his other two kids, and my grandmother ignores me for my sister.

    This year I have gone through some stuff but no one seems to care.

    I know that when my older brother Robbie died, my whole family was hurting. He died in March, and it was really hard to deal with, to make my family stop worrying about me I had to force myself to cry at his funeral.

    There was one person that I was open about my feeling to. She was my best friend Ashley. Then In June Ashley died and I had no one to talk to.

    I am depressed, but that is not my problem. I have learned to deal with depression. I have type 2 Bipolar, which means I am depressed a majority of the time.

    I am a privet person but realize that i need some help.

    Am I stupid for staying guarded?

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    1. Britnie, Im sorry you're feeling this way. Ive gone through some similar things in the past. My dad died 5 years ago when I was 13 (almost 14) and then two weeks later my grandma died, since then we havent stayed close with my extended family. Times like this can be tough. But the important thing to learn is that life goes on. Things are tough and unbearable at times but there are always ways to get through it. Being guarded is not always a bad thing. Personally, I don't discuss my feelings about my dad with anyone, I deal with it alone. That doesn't mean that I don't deal with it though. A great way to get through all of this is to write. I write letters (emails that I send back to myself and keep in a folder) to my dad whenever I feel I need to talk to him. Maybe try that? :) Hope you're well! You can always message me privately if you want to talk more! Happy December!!

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    2. My family has never been close, I went to my mom's mom's side of the family, family's reunion and everyone pretended that we were close, it was really annoying, being around a hundred people who pretended that they cared.

      Being there just raised so many question.

      Do you see me?
      Do you know me?
      Do I matter?
      Have I ever?
      Will I ever?
      Should I keep waiting?
      When will you notice me?
      When will I stop being hurt?
      When can you see me for me?
      When will you accept who I am?
      Will I have to change?
      Do I have to lose myself along the way?
      Am I strong enough?
      Good enough?
      I am who I am, shouldn't that be enough?

      I have always been put down by everyone and most of the time my family was the worst.

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  9. Hey Joy, how are you ? I hope you are okay. I wanted to ask your advice about trust, I really want to trust my mother but i don't know if she will accept what i say or not, and once she opened my fb account behind my back to know what happened between me and a friend we were arguing, so I would really appreciate it if you could tell me what should i do to trust my mum again.
    Thanks a lot x
    I love you xo

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    1. I am sure your mom loves you very much and is trying to look out for you. I understand that you are having trust issues, but it is your mom's job to see what is going on in your life. In this day and age of technology it can be a good thing and a dangerous thing. I think your mom is just making sure it doesn't turn dangerous. I would be thankful that your mom loves you enough to see what's going on. Also if you share things with your mom, never hide things, it's not worth it, you guys will keep the line of communication open and that is the most important.

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    2. Well thank you a lot, I appreciate you read this :).

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  10. Hello Joy! Thanks for creating this space, it means a lot to the fans.. we feel near you somehow.. :)
    I wanted an advice, because you write and maybe you will understand me. I write since I was a little girl, my grandma is a writer and my dad loves literature, so I grew up with books and storytales, and I loved writing about fantasy. I wrote many years.. and then the problem began when I become a teenager.. I have some troubles with inspiration, I can't get carried away.. I have a powerful imagination, that's no the problem. But it's like my mind was always putting obstacles. I'm always thinking and sometimes that don't let me write. Also, I use to relate my personal problems, my issues with my mom and dad with the characters.. like, it's very difficult to me to write a relationship between a mother and a daughter without thinking about my problems with my mom.

    I would really like to hear your opinion, but just to know that you maybe read this, make me happy :) You are my inspiration, my idol since I was 12 and started watching OTH. Now I'm 21 and you are still so important to me, may be more than ever.

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  11. Hello Joy!
    So glad you're doing this because although I'm pretty content with my life, especially this passed year, I'm afraid for it to end because I've been so lucky I even got to meet you back in January and hear you sing which was one of the highlights of 2012. Anyway, I've been struggling a lot with some family issues regarding my siblings. I love my sister, I mean we argue like siblings do but recently she's been getting into drugs and the things she posts on twitter it's like she's a whole other person. I know she's growing older but she shows that her social life is more important than her school work and I've seen people be that way and end up regretting it. I don't think she realizes how much harder college is going to be. Everytime I try to talk to her she argues "it's none of your business" At this point, I just don't want to see her mess up because my brother already has two daughters and he's 20 years old. She looks up to my brother and his girlfriend more than she does her two older sisters who have worked so hard to get where we are now and I just feel like no matter what I do it's not enough. I guess my question to you is, how should I approach my sister and her behavior? I know she's still a teenager and teenagers experiment but at the same time I don't want her to regret her choices. I don't want to see her get pregnant or in jail or worse, dead. I also fear that we could have a falling out like me and my brother had. It's been so hard for me to fix that relationship. I don't want to lose that bond but when she's with her friends she's this whole other person. I feel like her friends are more important to her than her own family.
    Sorry for the long post. lol
    Have a great day
    -Veronica

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    1. Veronica,

      Your sister is lost and trying to find her place just like the rest of us. Be patient. I went through a time with my sister where we were so different, I never thought we would see eye to eye. It sounds like your sister may be acting out for attention. It may seem odd, but a lot of teens actually seek trouble because they feel inadequate or over looked. The only thing you can do it continue to be there for your sister and love her. She will come around. If it takes getting into a little trouble it may be the best way for her to change her actions.

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  12. Hi,
    Just to say I love your blog and reading about your daily doings. You're so confident and love what you do but how did you find who you are and what you wanted to be??

    I'm 17 and don't really have a clue to who I am but I know I want to be a forensic scientist and that's about it.

    Bethan

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  13. hi just wanted to say you are doing a good thing for young wome. i have watched you since guiding light never saw one tree hill until this year but i have all of one tree hill seasons now love it love you and nathan and i also love you music i would love to see you in concert or plays i live in georgia so i cant go any where to see you i dont have a job to travel my daughter loves you to we listened to the video you posted of the country song on hellogiggles and we both think you did better than the original person that sung it and i think you sing country very good need more country videos of you thanks for all the time on guiding light i didnt like it when you went of thanks

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  14. This is so exciting! I am a HUGE fan! You are such a role model. I'm 16 and I just finished watching One Tree Hill on Netflix. I am seriously obsessed with that show. You are by far the BEST actress I have ever seen. You're so natural on scree, and it's amazing. You're also so PRETTY, i wish i looked like you! I hope that you continue with acting and singing, because I'm so sad that OTH is over
    :(
    So anyway I know you're like 15 years older than me but I needed advice on what I can do when I really like a guy but he likes someone else, who happens to be my best friend... It's kind of like an episode in one tree hill, but unfortunately it delt with peyton, brooke, and lucas, not your character. So I was just hoping you could give me advice what to do, because it would literally make my life if you answered. I was wondering if you ever experienced something like this when you were around my age, because obviously i don't think adults go through this.. but maybe I'm wrong.
    Anyway I love you, and i hope one day I can meet you! :) I never knew you sang Halo and when i was like 8 that was my favorite song, and then i realized that you sang it so i love it even more.

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  15. Hey Joy,
    i'm 15, i have a good friend whos mum died back in january, she's 15 as well. We are really close, but our friendship is just a laugh, we muck about, and chat, but nothing serious, so we don't really talk about her mum at all. But i want to be there for her over christmas, and in January, when it will be a year since her mum has been gone. Any Advice? She's incredibly strong considering, and she doesn't let anything affect her, so i think she holds it up a bit, so yeah, just wondered if you had any comments, could be very useful.
    Thank you! xoxo

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  16. you're amazing, Joy. trying to be as close as possible to your fans is wonderful :) I don't have real problem right now... and I think it's good, but If I have one, I'll send you a message, you can be sure of that!

    although I've got two questions for you. first one - how do you care about yourself? what makes you feel happy and relaxed? how do you find the time for yourself in this busy world? because sometimes I've got problem with this. I feel like there's no "me" during the week. and second one - what is your fashion inspiration? you always look so pretty! I'd like to know the trick :-)

    I know my questions are nothing and I think there're a lot of girls who need your advice. it's great you're here for them... for us :)

    J

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  17. Hey, Joy! Before I ask my question I just want to tell you something. You may not see this at all, but I wanted to tell you how much I appreciate you. You are an incredible person and such an inspiration to me. I love you so much and I hope you continue doing great things.

    I have a friend who is going through a rough time. She makes me cautious about people that are thin, because she has an eating disorder. She is bulimic, but she won't acknowledge that she is. Do you have any ideas on how I can address her about it to help her out?

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    1. Just to add more info her parents know and are helping her with it. I just want her to know that I know and want to be there for her. I know that it's personal and she is taking care of it in her family, but I want her to know that I am here if she needs me. That's what I need advice on how to address.

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  18. Hello, Joy! I am a huge fan of all your work. I do have a question to ask. Throughout my whole life, my father has been quite the monster. He gets in trouble with the law a lot, and when I was very young, he used to violently beat my mother. She struggled with my brother and I, and wanted to give us the world, so she left him. We still had a relationship with him as I was growing up, up until he went to prison for two years. My father was my absolute hero when I was little, he never hurt me or my brother in any way; he loved us more than anything in the world. We had supervised visitation until he broke my heart again and I decided to be adopted by my step-dad, to which my father agreed so he could get out of the $90,000 child support he owed. It's been almost 5 years since i've seen his face, and I find myself wishing and wondering how he is doing now. I am feeling a bit of guilt for pushing him out of my life, because even though he hurt others, he never hurt us. I miss him and think of him everyday, yet my whole family is so disturbed by him (especially my mother) and I don't know how to tell her that I think I need to reunite with him for closure. I need to know that he still loves me and misses me, because I want him to know that I forgive him. One Tree Hill taught me that forgiveness is love and it's good to release it from your heart and learn to move on. I just need to know how to tell my mother that I wish to see him again, for my own heart and mind. I need advice on how to let my family know gently, and that i'm not meaning them any harm or disappointing them, or for even choosing him over them. Because I do truly love my step-dad for taking us in under his wing; I just feel I need to follow my heart. If you can help, it would mean the world to me. I need words from a new mind.

    Best wishes,
    Alyssa

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  19. Hi Joy!

    So, I have a bit of a dilemma I've faced for a while now. I love to act and find such joy and happiness in it, but my confidence isn't all that good infront of crowds. I'm coming to that point in my schooling life now where I need to start focusing on the things I want to pursue in the future, and taking drama would be such a fun choice for me. But sometimes before I go on stage I get really bad nerves to the point where I feel nauseous. Do you have any tips on how to overcome stage fright? If so it would really help coming from one of my most inspirational actresses.

    I hope you and sweet Maria are doing well :)

    Love, Grace x

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  20. Hi Joy! I'm a girl and i'm 18. last year i've a boyfriend and i loved it so much but he left me because i wasn't ready to make love with him because I was and am virgin! Sinse our breck i don't have a boyfriend because i'm afraid and i can not fall in love and can not trust!! Can you give me some advice for fall in love still? I ask you because you are my idol and my favourite actress and you are a strong and intelligent woman!
    Write soon!

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    1. Sorry I HAD A BOYFRIEND!!

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  21. We live in a society where a woman's appearance/weight is valued more than her personality. It's depicted in TV shows, movies and even in real life. Jessica Simpson, Kirstie Alley and Kelly Clarkson are among the female stars who have been constantly ridiculed for their weight. Yet, on the contrary, thin women are also mocked for being "too thin". It seems as if nobody can win in a world where you are damned if you gain weight and damned if you don't. How do we change this way of thinking? What can we do to teach young women (and men) that beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder? How can we stop this obsession with weight and instead bring more attention to more important things such as education, world issues and philanthropy? More importantly, as an actress, what are YOUR opinions on the media and how it portrays "beautiful" women?

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  22. Hi Bethany,

    Firstly, a big thank you for the free time that you are ready to give your fans. Thank you also for all that you bring me now for many years. Without you, I certainly will not be there today, you can believe me.

    If I leave you this message is for you to share a part of my life that is painful. I'm 27 years old, my father died soon 4 years ago, he left the family early, leaving me alone with my mother. 23 years later, after having writing a letter, we we find. This time for 4 months. My father died of heart failure. My mother recently had an emergency hospitalization for heart failure also. Following this, I also did my test that proves unfortunately not very good

    My mother has suffered during the absence of my father, my relationships are unfortunately not very good with it. I can not speak of a lack of father I feel afraid of hurting him again. I also afraid to tell him the truth about my health, lest it hurt him again. She is my only family.

    I'm lost, I must remain in silence to stop the hurting, or all unveiled?

    Sorry for this long message and big thank you for reading me hoping a little help from you.

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  23. Hi Beathany! I'm 15 and I love One Tree Hill, its my favorite show and you were my favorite actress in it. I think that you are a very nice and im glad your so loyal to you fans.
    Thanks,

    Sydney

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  24. Hi Joy! That's what I think about beeing a teenager :

    It's not always easy being a teenager, we're constantly judged on what we do, what we look like : our makeup, our outfits, our haircut. We want to be like others, but at the same time, we want to be "us" We know what we want to be, what we want to do, but it's often confused. WE ARE confused. At school, there's bullying, at home, there are, sometimes, problems with our parents... It's really hard being a teenager. Teenagers are brutal between them, we need to be tough! And honestly, if I could, I would skip the "being a teenager" part of my life. That's my opinion about "Beeing a teenager" what's yours?

    Mailie
    xxx
    ps: english is not my first language so.. be nice to me if there are mistakes.. :)

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  25. hi! i love one tree hill, and you are my favorite character! when i stared in 8th grade i got some problems home and and dropped out of school and my life was a hell. i was bullied my mom and dad was always arguing and i just came home from school and i was on my room the rest of the day. the day everything changed was when i was week and i decided to talk to some one about it and they called the child welfare when i got home from school that day and heard my mom and dad was arguing they said something i never will forget, they said ''that child has ruined our life'' that week moment when i couldn't hold it inside me anymore and needed to talk to someone i get to regret the rest of my life, i wish i could take it all back. My grandpa died a few years back of cancer, when my mom came home and told me that he was dead my heart broke i have never been able to fix it and now that everything just getting worse i sure as hell cant to it. i started cutting my self i few month back.. i realized i was week, i was nothing.i had so many questions about how i was going to get throw this and why did it have to be my, my family and have i really ruined the family. then stared watch one tree hill, i stared on season 1 and i just sat there for hours and watched and i was getting so many answers/advice so i continued to watch and i just loved it. i know its just a tv show but most of the advice/answers came from Haley, you played it so well that when i watched i actually started to believe! you are the best! you was/are a big part of why my life is better, in just one year.


    ps: i know its probably very many writing mistakes, i am a 14 years old Norwegian girl and since i dropped out of school last year i really suck at English -.- sorry

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    1. Hi! i'm 18 and I've done the same thing one year before, cutting myself, but it's not the solution, and now i regret it so much, we always need to face our problems without doing this! We All can do it, trust me. Life is not as easy as we thought, and one tree hill, and music helps me to going through this.
      Just be yourself, do what you love, and remember that ANYONE is week, we all are strong! I know that a lot of people we loved just die but, this is the life and those people watch us from above, so don't be sad beacause we need to be tough for them, think that they are happy up there because they are. Live your life, realise your dream. Life is short and deserve to be lived as we want, create your life for yourself and enjoy it. "Nothing lasts forever" as brooke said ;)

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  27. Hi Joy!

    Thank you for opening up this forum. It’s acts as a little haven for young bright women, and we need to be cheerleaders to one another.

    Here’s my question:

    While wondering aimlessly on a social networking site (that shall remained unnamed), I noticed quite a bit of cyber-bullying. I was shocked to discover the severity of the issue. The words being used were so harsh and people were spitting them out like it was natural, normal even. I was even more shocked when I realized it was almost ALL coming from young women. Why are girls so mean to each other? It has become so prevalent I begin to worry younger generations will begin to normalize this type of negativity. How can young women to a better job at advocating against cyber-bullying?

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  28. I feel truly honored to be given the chance to communicate with you in some way, even if it's never actually recognized. Yes, I fell in love with your character on OTH - but after that last episode, I was left wanting more of you in my life! So yay for modern technology, I was able to keep up with you even after Haley was long gone :(

    So that being said, reading your blog a few months ago, I felt really inspired to be my best self. At just 24, I'm the mother of two boys -- My oldest just turned 5 and my youngest will be 2 in January. I love my sons with every fiber in my being and I want to make sure that I'm living my life to the fullest for them, but I've felt myself become discouraged lately. I've had a very difficult time losing the baby weight from my youngest and I can feel myself succumbing to the unhappiness and I just really don't want that to happen.

    That being said, you look FANTASTIC after Maria and I was just wondering what your mommy secrets were -- How did you come back from baby? And how do you do it while being healthy?

    I know my question is far less dire than some of the posts I've read, so I understand if no response is given. I've been trying to motivate myself to be back on track and it seems to be working, slowing but surely!

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  29. Hi Joy! First off, thank you opening up your blog this section- it shows how caring you are to want to give advice and connect with your fans. That means a lot.
    As you stated above, I am one of the many young women who became a fan of yours through One Tree Hill. The show has taught me many life lessons and gotten me through a lot. The music, quotes, characters, story lines, and lessons will stay with me for a lifetime- especially the character of Haley.
    Naturally, my question revolves around what high-school Brooke had to deal with in OTH.
    “That’s what I’m afraid of. Not being enough. Not good enough. Not smart enough. Not pretty enough.”
    I know that Brooke was not alone is thinking these thoughts, and I'm sure that her words resonated with every young women watching. And I still experience it, being a university student and trying to find my place in this world. Moving away from home for school has been the result of some of my hardest experiences in life so far. When I'm lonely, when I'm feeling not smart enough, not good enough, not pretty enough, sometimes it's really overwhelming because these thoughts are all that I think about. Then I start to think, is there a purpose to life if I never feel like I am enough? These thoughts are troubling, and fortunately not common, but they have come up enough times to make me reflect on my being. So Joy, I am wondering, do these feelings ever go away? And more importantly, is it okay to feel this way sometimes? Does it teach us something? How do you deal with these feelings when they come up? Would you have anything to share with your experiences with feeling this way?

    Thank you Joy, all the best!

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  30. Bethany-
    I'm 15, and everything is just so confusing. Lately I have no clue what I'm going to do with my life. I've lost a lot of trust in people that I really care about. And I don't want to, but I just feel like I'm losing them. The only thing I'm certain about, is that music is a HUGE part of me, and that without it, I'm nothing. My friends are supportive with my decision of wanting music to be all of me, but my parents just don't understand, they think that if I become a singer, that I'll change. I'll change into a singer, and do drugs and drink alcohol. But if they don't understand me well enough to know I wouldn't do that, then was my life just nothing to them? Do they not know anything about me? What do I do? Thank you for reading this. And I hope I can find some answers.

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  31. Hey I hope you are doing well while getting ready for the holidays. I know you have tons to read..i hope you might even read mine. I feel as if there are two parts to me..not in a bipolar way but as in part of me is content in being in nursing school, having a boyfriend..having my hobbies. Yet another part is dying to sing or act..or both. I love to sing..i havent had any professional help in a long time..but i write lyrics..i record the tunes and ive written about 30 songs this year..i love watching actors/actresses like you make a difference out of a character you play and i desire that. I am just confused about which path to lead..i love my life..the choices in it..But i have an incredible desire to take off in a completely different direction.
    You are very inspiring and i am glad you are taking time to get to know us more. Even if you cant reply to all...you are making an effort and i appreicate it. I dont know if ill ever get the chance to meet you...so this is really awesome :) Thank you for all you do,
    - AShley
    P>S please keep singing...make more cds..your songs are ridiculously good!!

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  32. Hi Joy this is a great idea thank you for doing this and I was just wondering on how to feel confident in the way that you look?

    Love From Nicola and the UK
    I was also wondering do you have a fan address xx

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  33. Hellloooooooo there!!!!! So I haven't really got an advice question but I would like to know if you are still going to be continuing Diamond Gothic?? Also just to let you know I find your writing very inspiring and entered a poetry competition at college and came third so thanks so so much! I can email the poem to you if you like?! p.s. my bday is on 9th december and it would mean the world if I could get a shoutout @thisisyasmin_ :D Loveeee you sending good vibes ~~~~~~~~<3

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  34. Hello,

    I don't have a issue to discuss (at the present!) but did just want to say thank you for this wonderful idea. As a teenage girl it can be hard to find someone to talk to; not everything can be discussed with Mum, after all! But this offers the ideal place to get problems of your chest with people who you don't know, but who you are sure will not judge you.

    Thank you for this and for being a consistant and worthy role-model to girls like myself!

    xx

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  35. Hello Bethany Joy! I am such a fan and am always grateful for Haley on One Tree Hill. She got me through some really rough times. Anytime I feel sad or anole, I can open up Netflix and Tree Hill is there for me.

    I am 18 and thus far have not been very active in the romance department. I haven't even really kissed anyone that mattered. I am feeling a lot of pressure (mostly from myself) to party and have sex. I know in the back of my mind that it'll happen when it happens and not to worry, but for some reason I just feel uncomfortable that I haven't done IT yet.

    It's like what Haley said, "Sometimes I feel incredibly disconnected, really uncomfortable in my own skin, or kind of like I don’t fit into this world. Like I was born at the wrong time and I don’t belong.” I would honestly rather spend my friday nights watching movies and writing rather than spending money to club.

    Do you have any advice for me? I just feel like I don't belong. All of my friends are obsessed with boys and sex. I just want to be in love...

    xo

    Sydney

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  36. Hey Joy! I'm a 24 young mom of a 9 month baby girl and I can not have one minute for myself! I can make up a little to go to work, so How can you be so pretty as you are a single mom? i would like to feel pretty again! lol
    waiting for your advices!

    have a nice evening, love

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  37. Hi Joy,
    I am so glad you are back! I think having the "Talk about it" page is wonderful! Sometimes it is nice to get opinions from those not so close to your situation. A fresh pair of ears to listen. Here is my question:
    I just lost my dad almost a month ago and I haven't been able to grieve his loss. I don't know if it is because I have a 7 year old who needs me so I am just staying strong for him or is it something else? I do have a lot of guilt about not seeing him more often before he passed. Life can get so busy and I let my visits to the nursing home slip. I am the youngest of 7 kids but my older siblings and I do not talk much. They told me at the funeral that we are no longer family. That obligation died when dad did. I have a wonderful husband but he has never lost anyone so he doesn't quite know how to help me. I always anticipated being a huge mess and had prepared him for that. But yet here I am numb, not crying, not freaking out. I worry that he has been lulled into a false sense of security, that this is as bad as it will get. I think I am bound to break down and freak out eventually. Do you have any advice on how to make myself deal with this in a healthy way? When I was young I was a cutter so naturally I am scared to death that I will break down and cut and I don't want that. My son doesn't need to see that side of me.

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  39. Dear Joy,

    First, I want to thank you for doing this. It is kind and wonderful of you, and reminds me why you amaze me. For being a celebrity, you are so down to earth and private about your personal life. It is quite refreshing. Second, I'm going to go on the assumption that out of the hundreds of comments you are going to get with this, you are not going to respond to mine, and I understand. I just feel privileged that you have opened this up to the many of us you love your blog and love reading what you have to write. You have always been an inspiration but especially when you worked to get fit after you had Maria... It seems like I have always been trying to lose weight and get fit and I just want to ask you if there were any specific exercise(s), cutting out of a certain food(s), or such things that you did to help you? I know all bodies are different and react differently to different situations. For me, I always tend to gain weight when I'm stressed and most people I know are the opposite, but I'm not looking to be stick thin I just want to be healthy. Just healthy and happy... but then again that is usually everyone's goal.

    Thank you,
    Tasha

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  40. Hi Joy. Welcome back.

    I'm with my boyfriend for more than 4 years now and I'm only 21... I love him, and we live together in a flat. However sometimes I wonder if I'm not missing something, if I'm not too young to be in a stable relationship like mine. Love is complicated at every ages I know, but I'm kinda confused sometimes and I feel like I'm not enjoying every day as a young woman... I feel old like my parents haha. Silly maybe, I don't know...

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    1. Hi there! I know your question wasn't addressed to me, but I am in a similar situation and also used to worry about it a little bit. It can be hard to be completely happy with yourself and your life when there's a certain idea about what it means to be a female in your 20s that you feel you're missing out on.

      I'm 25 and have been in a relationship for 6 years now - we met when I was 19 and got married when I was 22. While my friends have had more flexibility to work in different countries and cities, being in this relationship has been my priority. We've both made compromises to be together, but for the last couple of years I've particularly struggled to find a good job where we currently live.

      I've found it really important to know who I am as an individual, as well as one half of a couple, and to make time for the things that I enjoy. I also try and focus on the things I love and appreciate about my boyfriend/husband at every stage of life. I know that we inspire and bring out the best in each other, and I really like the person I am with him in my life. Even though there are some opportunities and experiences that I'm missing out on, for me, the things I gain are worth the sacrifices. I love the adventure of being in love, the struggle and achievement in making two lives fit together, the stupid shared jokes and little things that no one else gets. To me, it's miraculous and life-changing, so I'm grateful I get to experience this from a relatively young age.

      Also, I think it's important to remember every lifestyle has its sacrifices and restrictions - I have had single friends who've felt lonely and slightly envied the stability of my relationship, even as I've sometimes wanted their flexibility to please themselves in their decisions about everything from what to eat for dinner to where to live. I'm learning that genuine contentment and joy comes is easier to experience when I stop comparing myself with other people or ideals, and live in the way that makes sense to me.

      I really hope that you'll find your own way of making sense of your experiences, and that some of what I've said will help a little.

      If you want to read more, I've actually wrote a blog post along similar lines a few months ago:

      Postcard from a Peaceful Place

      Best wishes xxx

      Delete
  41. Hola Joy, nose si vas a leer mi mensaje yo no hablo Ingles Soy de Argentina hablo Español. Uso un traductor para poder entender lo que dices y pones en tu pagina y en facebook.
    Quiero que sepas que te admiro mucho soy fan tuyo me encanto One Tree Hill es mi serie favorita la vi repetida varias veces. Tu personaje de Haley me dejo mucha enseñanza y te agradezco por eso.

    Sos muy bella mujer y seguramente muy buena madre. Te admiro mucho y me gusta estar en contacto con vos.

    Ojala leas mi mensaje y me conteste y si algun dia venis a visitar Argentina aqui tus fans seriamos muy felices.

    Quiero saber de donde una mujer y madre saca fuerzas para enfrentar una separacion del hombre que alguna vez amamos?? quisiera saber tu opinion!

    Gracias

    Besoooos!!!

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  42. Hi Joy! Just wanted to say that I am happy your blog is up and running again. It is one blog that I could read over and over again. Your posts never get boring or dull and each post I learn something new.
    I guess my questions to you wouldn’t be about advice on being a girl, but, being a girl that has suffered from depression, I find it difficult to let people in. I recently lost my Grandmother in August, it was sudden and I was in the hospital room with her, my mom, grandfather and other close family members when she took her last breath and it was that moment that I knew the true meaning of life. That you could be here one moment and gone the next. I had just talked to her the week before about my diploma coming in the mail. You see, because of my depression I was unable to finish high school. So I got my GED. I couldn’t deal with the pressure I was getting from my guidance counselor and the principle, it just made matters ten times worse. It has been close to four months since we’ve lost my Grandmother. It is that phone call that keeps replaying in my mind because I told her I would be down that Saturday to see her and the joy in her voice when I said that, it was like she won the lottery. There are moments where I just break down and cry for what seems like ever to me. Or if I just look at my Grandfather and see that look of lose in his eyes, something I’ve never seen before. My questions are, is it wrong for me to feel selfish about crying? I cannot help but think she wouldn’t want me to be upset all the time and I know she wouldn’t want me to go back to the dark times with my depression. Being as she was my rock in a hard place when I was going through that. I try to be strong and seem like nothing is bothering me, but since I don’t open up to a lot of people, I find it hard to talk to the friends that I have. How do I know when it is the right time to finally have the strength to face things regarding my Grandmother? I know it is going to take time to heal, but I don’t think time will ever fill the void that I have.

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  43. Hello Joy!

    I'm Brazilian, 20, I have a very long history in which I can not describe exactly this text.
    I appreciate your work since OTH. I know this is a tv series and everything was fictitious. But we know that these things exist in the world.
    Today dating a girl, 17, dated for three years. Things are very complicated nowadays. Every beginning is always nice right?
    Well, we know we always have fights and etc, because every couple has it right?
    We are truly loves, but sometimes she thinks that it is not time to stop ..
    now gave what he had to give ...
    I love my girlfriend a lot and even though I think all of our problems right fight for what I want for us. And I hope I'm right.
    Thanks for making that perfect character named "Haley James."
    I'll never forget this tv series as well as many people in the world.
    I will be grateful if at least read this text.
    Kisses and more kisses.
    xoxo

    @Iuryvt

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  44. Hi Joy ! :)

    So glad you're doing this, because I really need some advices right now and I'm sure that you'll give the perfect advices ahah.
    So,I'm a 17years old french girl, and I'm actually in my last year of High School. The french school system is really strict and intensive. Every week we have a test of 2 hours, and every time I study a lot for the test like 4hours. But I often have bad marks and it's a little discouraging. I think I get a little panic and I stress to much when I'm doing the test so that's why I have bad results. So I wanted to know if you have any advices to not stress, or a little ritual to not panic. At the end of the year I have a BIG exam, if I succeed I will go to college but if I fail I'll have to do my last year of high school again and I do not want it !

    I'm looking forward to hearing from your advices. Sorry for my english I hope it wasn't so bad ahah.
    Much love from France ♥
    Léa.

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    1. I do the same exact thing! Its totally normal! :) make a test of your own, that you don't know the answers to, and study study study! Take the test, soon you'll get it! :) I wouldn't worry too much about it. Ask your teacher for help, or a close friend! :)

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  45. Hello) i'm from Ukraine) we watch one tree hill here too, so i want to THANK you! you and your couple with James was the best for me! you are the great actress, singer and i think that you're great person. i'm only 23, but i had divorced, i know that it is not big problem in Hollywood, but now i'm happy, i have met my love, we have the greatest son, he is 8 month today)))
    i wish you all the best)
    p.s. sorry for mistakes, especially in times))) Polina. if you answer me - i'll be happy( i know that you're busy, and you have many such people like me, so if you don't - i understand) thank you)

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  46. Hi Bethany, first off I love you and all that you post!! I don't really look at blogs much, But ever sense I came across yours I can't wait for your posts! I have a small blog "Handicappable" I don't post a lot and have flaws in my writing but
    if you could see it and talk about it it would mean a lot

    Love and blessings xoxoxo

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  47. What is your advice for people who don't seem to have a passion in life? I've taken 60+ credits in college in all different areas, but nothing seems to speak to me. I feel like something is wrong with me!

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    1. Nothing is wrong with you! :) not everybody finds something they have a passion for right away in life! :) you just need to take some time for it to find you, don't try to find it! :)

      Delete
  48. First of all thank you :) its a good idea to share with you a little more . My name is Nabila and here's my question : What do you do when you're stressed ?

    Because I stressed a lot , for my tests especially .. and another question ( less serious haa ) : Any advices for a girl with thick hair ?


    XOOXO LOVE

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    1. When you are stressed you need to find what you love to do, and do that! If that doesn't work, take a relaxing bath and put some relaxing music on and lay down and close your eyes. But don't fall asleep. That'll ruin how you'll feel afterward! :)

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  49. Hi Joy,

    Hope you are fine. I'm Anouck from Switzerland and I'm 30 years old.
    I would like to know if one time you will come in Switzerland for a show ou a showcase?

    kiss from my mountains ;-)

    Anouck

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  50. Joy,

    Thank you so much for putting this section into your blog. I admire your confidence and would love some advice.

    I've always been kind of shy and reserved, and over the past few years, since I got to college, I've noticed that it's been halting my social skills -- I've never had a boyfriend and I'm going into my last year at university. I'm slightly embarrassed and I'm not sure many of my friends know. I'd love some advice on how to gain more self-confidence so I can find someone to hopefully spend the rest of my life with.

    Thank you so much!

    Anonymous

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  51. hello Bethany, here a little thought, i think it's important talk about this. Thank you for you're kindness.
    Girl has a lot of advantages. This may be true in some areas of the world, but in others, women, girls and babies suffer real and hideous cruelty. One of the less discussed problems is infibulation. Girls mutilated, forced into a horrible life. I think it's a good topic to discuss, to combat such cruelty and inform all the girls that there is always a way out.
    Thank you,
    Eleonora

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  52. Hey Joy,

    Thank you for opening this page to talk to your fans. :).

    I have always had a problem with feeling like no one cares about me.

    My mother was young when she had me. She was eighteen, a pot head and irresponsible, but she is my mom and I love her. She is better now. She was only sixteen when she had my brother and less than a year later she had my sister. She did some stupid things when she was younger but her parents were not always around. She left me with my grandmother (Nana) when I was 2. Then she fully walked out of my life when I was 4. She came back when I was 9. We are dealing with our issues.

    Robert -21. We are half siblings (we have the same mom). He had Muscular Dystrophy, and he died on March 21st, 2012. His lungs had collapsed more than once and MD was causing him heart issues. Being around him was hard because he was always happy and tried to make everyone smile. He was good at hiding his true feelings. He is depressed because all of his friends who had MD had died when they were younger, he live for 6 years longer then the doctors thought he would.

    Jessica -21. Full blood. We fight all the time. I hate the fact that I always have to do things for her. She makes me feel like a servant that she does not want.

    As for my dad he has always been around but he does not care about what I do. He has a new wife and two other kids Amanda- 18 and Andrew- 15. Half (same dad). They are spoiled. He shows that are more important to him than me and my sister.

    My Nana is a pain and has not always showed that she cares; she has always been closer and nicer to Jessica then to me. From a young age she would abuse me for no reason.

    I am trying to stop being totally invisible. I am trying to find some one who cares enough.

    You look right through me.
    Like I am not even here.
    You think you know me.
    You don't.
    Maybe one day you will see me.
    You notice my mistakes.
    You see my misfortunes.
    I am me.
    I am really here.
    I have feelings.
    Maybe one day you will meet me.
    I am human.
    I am not a piece of glass.
    Although you can shatter me.
    With your cruel cruel glance.
    I may stumble.
    I may fall.
    You laugh at me.
    You call me names.
    Like I am not there.
    Like I feel no pain.
    I am here.
    I am human.
    I feel pain.
    Just because to you I am no one.
    Dose not mean I am not someone.
    I am not invisible.
    I am not a freak.
    I am who I am.
    Take me.
    Or leave me.
    I will not change.
    I will not lose myself.
    To be come an invisible shell.
    I am not transparent.
    I am not invisible.
    I am me.

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  53. This is a wonderful initiative.
    I will try to give a tip. Women all over the world are facing very important problems. But for one problem we don't talk enough: infibulation. Infibulation concerns many women, but not limited to, especially girls who suffer in atrocious way. their lives are destroyed. I think talking about it will help tackle this barbarous, horrible and painful. What do you think? I believe that the information and debate are important. thanks bethany for this
    Eleonora

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  54. bethany! i love your blog and i thank you for kepping it because we(oth fans) are kind missing you, but i think you need a space for more 'simply fans' questions' because i think this (talk about it) is more for girls who want advice for their life. anyway we really love you thank you for keeping in touch with your fans!

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  55. Bethany, as a 24 year old woman I have watched one tree hill since it started..my friend and I for about 2 months did a one tree hill marathon 2 or 3 times a week. I was really happy to see that you had a page and that you wanted to hear from your fans....the reason I am writing is because a little less than a year and a half ago I was given the opportunity to move to Texas for the restaurant I worked for. My boyfriend and I( he also works for the company and is a manager) that wouldn't seem like much but I lived in Illinois with my mom and twin sister...so I moved 1000 miles away from a small town I lived in for most of my life. I have made a lot of friends but a couple moved back or moved away. To say the least even though I have friends here I feel so alone...my boyfriend and I don't seem to get along as much as we use to,and I spend most of my time in the bedroom watching tv alone while he watches tv in the other room, or I have one friend who I've known for years that moved here too. I just feel alone and sometimes wish I could just move home to be there with the mother who did everything to raise me and my sister without any help. And my sister who I've never found a better friend. But the opportunities I have here are better than a small town. I guess what I am asking is the first time you moved away from everything you knew, what helped you get thru missing your home...or even now with as much moving as I am sure you have done, does it get any easier????

    Thank you,
    L

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  56. I want to say thank you for doing this for all the fans. I was wondering how you got noticed as an actress and singer. I live in a small town in North Carolina and was not given the oppertunity to pursue it as a child. I am now 30 and still look like I am in high school. Would love to at least sing. Please give me a little insight. My family loves watching the reruns of One Tree Hill. I went and bought the CD soundtracks for them and all the Seasons on DVD. Thanks so much for the insperation to try and pursue what I want. Didn't think I could and the age I am. But seeing you makes me realize that I can still pursue it.

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  57. Hi Joy!

    I adored you since the first episode of One Tree Hill. So, thank you for inspiring me every day. I learned so much from you. Maybe you can help me one more time.
    There is a boy... His name is Stephan. Yeah, I know that sounds so normal, but I really care about him. We never were a couple but for some time he was the most important person in my life. But then he wanted more and tried to kiss me when we went out together. I was so confused, I didn't expect that. I needed to talk with someone, so I told my best friend about that. He found out and was hurt. We had a fight and now he doesn't want to speak with me anymore. From one to the other day it was over. And I don't know why. Why can't he understand that I had to talk about it with someone? Why is he so angry? I thought he liked me... I tried to speak to him about a hundred times but he didn't want to. I don't know what I can do more. I really like him... I know that I made lots of mistakes but so did he. I just want to talk with him for one last time, try to explain. But he doesn't even give me the chance. I don't want to loose him but I can't see a way to get him back.
    Maybe you have got an answer or a good advice for me, it would mean a lot to me. Thank you! - A.

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  58. Sometimes I just feel all alone in this world. Although I know I have a lot of friends and family that love me, it's like there's something missing. Like there was supposed to be something more to fill a gap in my heart. I just don't know what.

    What should I do?

    -Matilde

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  59. Hi Joy!
    I have a serious question. I am 18 years old, in six months I have to choose the direction of my studies. For a long time I love theater and acting. I took part in several plays, no big deal but still. I'm always nervous before going on stage, but when I play I feel ... free and it is a fantastic feeling. I love it! Despite everything I think that I'm not good enough to go to drama school. I think it may be too difficult for me. But I want to ask you, what were your beginnings? And do you have any ways to deal with stress?
    I will be grateful for your response.

    With love, Natalia.

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  60. Hi Bethany, just wanted to say I love your blog and all that you are doing. You have such an opportunity of influence in so many young people's lives. Really great to see that your also a Christian and showing Gods love in what you do, I love that. Also wanted you to know that what you do and your influence matters so much. Never take it for granted. I have such a big respect for you. What an amazing work you are doing for the kingdom of God.

    Love & blessings,

    Your Australian friend,

    Stacey xxx

    Ps. Your daughter is absolutely beautiful, looks like your also a wonderful mummy xx

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  61. Hi Joy!

    You've directed on One Tree Hill before and you did a fantastic job! I am an aspiring director. I am currently in college taking television production classes and I absolutely love it. Since you are in the television world I wanted to know how common it is for there to be women directors. When we think of the great film directors we tend to think of men and off the top of my head I cannot think of any women directors. Are they more common in the television world rather than film? TV is what I want to do. Directing is my dream and my passion. If you have any advice to a young woman following her dream in this difficult field it would be appreciated greatly.

    Thank You,
    Tori H.

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  62. Hi Joy!
    I have a BIG problem. I have a problem with finding the right dress for my prom? I still have a month, but I'm starting to panic a little bit. I'm of average height, slim, and I have long, straight brown hair. I'm looking for dress that would be original and unique. But I don't want this dress to be too extravagant. I'm looking for something rather simple but elegant. Do you have any idea?
    Please help me! You have an amazing style.

    My mail: nligo23@gmail.com
    Twitter: @nelligo

    Natalia

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  63. Hi Bethany!

    This is such a lovely way to give your fans the oppertunity to contact you!!

    I absolutely adore One Tree Hill and even though it is all finished, i have every single series on DVD and watch them over and over... (much to my boyfriends annoyence!). but it never gets old :)

    I study drama at university here in the UK and would like to become a drama teacher, however i once dreamt to be acting alongside people like yourself :)

    Do you have any way i can personally write to you via email or general mail? i am currently seeking some things to add to a growing collection of OTH memerabelia.

    you are a real inspiration Bethany and i wish you all the best in your future career :)

    Lisa

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  64. Hi Bethany!!

    I loved all of your music on One Tree Hill, and the songs you have posted on Youtube!

    I found a few videos of people who post songs from your album, I was wondering if your album was still available? Or If it will be available again or on Itunes? I would really love to buy a copy if it is!!

    Thank you

    xoxo

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  65. Bethany,

    I feel a little silly writing on your blog, but I have been a long-time fan of yours, loving your work on both Guiding Light and One Tree Hill.

    I know you recently went through a divorce, and I know it's a very personal area of life, but I feel I am at a crossroads in my marriage, and I would like some advice on how to know when to end it?

    My husband and I have been to marriage counseling on and off for several years. His family has a history of mental illness, and he struggles with depression. It has been a really tough seven years. We don't have children.

    My family loves and supports me; however, they don't believe in divorce and are definitely not in favor of me ending the marriage. I don't want to let them down.

    I myself believe in marriage and I don't want to be divorced. I am stable with a good job and a great education. Yet I am conflicted with my faith and my marriage. Should I be waiting for God to change my husband? Should I be waiting on God to change my heart?

    I'd love to hear some advice about being a faith-filled person who has made a decision to divorce...



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  66. Hi Bethany,

    I just discovered your newest project Diamond Gothic and I am hooked! It's such an interesting story and I am impressed at how well the three voices blend seemlessly together.

    And now I am wondering, "When does the next part come out?"

    Until then I will be desperately waiting...

    Jade

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  67. Hi. I don't know if you will ever read this and I don't really have a question I'm just in need of encouragement. I have never opened up to anyone I just put up a wall and pretend I'm okay. I feel alone a lot and I feel worthless. I don't feel special or important. I'm surrounded by lots of people but its like if I disappeared no one would notice or care. I don't fit in anywhere. I have friends that are only my friends when they have no one else at the time. I don't fit into the standards of the world. I'm a 16 year old girl, a junior in high school and I hate it. I'm not beautiful or skinny. I just wish I could find one place where people actually like me for ME. I don't want to waste the" best years of my life" worrying about this junk. This is the first time I have ever talked about this to anyone. Thank you for this Joy. I needed something like this because I can actually put what I'm REALLY feeling and maybe get some help. So thank you. God bless you.

    - Grace

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  68. Bethany~
    I'm 15, and a girl just trying to find my way. Lately I've been thinking, with the new year and everything, I don't want to lie to the people I love and I want to tell them the whole truth. But I don't know where to start, I've got so much to tell them, but the truth is going to hurt them. I know it. So where do I start?

    ReplyDelete
  69. I have happened upon this blog by accident but liked what has been written here by tone and sincerity. I am struggling to help a close friend and perhaps an outside view may be beneficial.

    The question is simple...the answer not so much...

    What do you tell someone who has the talent and ability to be greater than they are but lack the support system or inspiration that most successful people have to get them there?

    When the fear they have for achieving their silent dreams is not for failure but success?

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  70. Hi,
    I am a HUGE fan! I was wondering if you recorded Leaving Town Alive? and if so Were can I purchase it, download it? or any of the music from One Tree Hill that you have recorded?

    Thanks for sharing your talent!

    Andreya

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  71. Hi Bethany ! Well first of all I got to say that iam from Canada (Montréal) so I speak french! Je parle français mais je me débrouille aussi en anglais. Je ferais du mieux que je peux. (I speak french better then english but i'll try my best for you to understand me.) I would like to tell you how much i love One tree hill because it's not just a TV show. Behind every episodes and each seasons, there is a moral. A message that helps us to face problems in our lives. For me, it does.

    Recently ive been through so much in my life. I had a big and important surgery for and new hip (iam 20 years old) and a big heartbreak. I also lost a good friend in an accident. That changes my life and i was in a bad place in my life. I also like to sing and i use to LOVE my life but since all that, i changed. I wasn't the same person. I didn't have inspiration at all and i tryed my best to be happy but it was hard. Now for a few months I'm doing better. I do what I like and what makes me feel better and what made ​​me see that life is beautiful. Now, I understood that i deserve to be happy but iam not longer the exact person I was. There still something broken in me. I have anxiety and I always have nightmares.

    So Bethany, you are an artist and you seem to have a good life for doing what you love. Acting, singing, being a mom, share with the world your talent and also knowing that what you do gives hopes to few people. But when you have a hard time, how do you deal with it?

    When we have a hard time it's difficult to see the light again. It's hard to laugh, smile, or even trust people again.(example: because of an ex boyfriend who beat me and who was cheating on me for 2 years)I know that it's normal to have ups and downs but do you have any advice for how are we suppose to move on and realy believe that everything is going to be all right.. or like they use to be?

    I hope my writting wasn't so bad lol. Well even if the chances you wrote me back are slight, I felt good to write to you. Sometimes it helps to talk to people you don't even know!

    Thank you and I wish you a happy new year and wish you all the best for your futur project.

    rabzouza22@hotmail.com

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  72. Hi Joy,
    I'm a high school senior applying to film schools around the country and I wondering if you had any advice for me, a young filmmaker-wannabe. I'm applying to UNCW because I think the environment is better for me opposed to LA. As much as I want to pursue filmmaking, I don't know if I will be able to find a way to be successful without forfieting my beliefs. Any advice?

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  73. HI Joy, I'm a french fan so excuse my english please. I follow One Tree Hill since the begining and I discovered with the wire of the episodes your songs and your texts which touch me. You are a singer and a very talented actress. I consider it regrettable that your album is not available to the sale in the French stores because I love your musical universe. Your songs and your texts are so beautiful. I would like so much to see you on scene in France. Are one or more concerts in France envisaged? It's my dream !!!
    I imagine that is impossible to answer everyone but I keep hope. I hope to be able to have an answer.
    I hope that my English is not too bad and that you will be able to understand me. I will wish to know if you will have an address to communicate with you or an account twitter. If you want to follow me on twitter : @jennyjenniii.

    xoxoxo
    Jennifer (french fan)

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  74. How do you keep your faith strong in this industry? I feel like I am being torn in so many different directions, none of which are where I know I should be going. I feel like I am failing, because I am giving in to things I probably shouldn't. I know I shouldn't. It's not healthy. But I don't know what to do. Because I can't just stop. But I'm growing further and further away from God. And I'm scared of where I am going. Sometimes I hate being a girl in this world where I am defined by a number on a scale or a number on my jeans. I can't even remember the last time I actually felt beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can totally understand you :) and I know what I'm going to say won't surprise you but i want to, i have to. at first:
      No matter what you look like . All that matters is how you feel ??? DO like yourself ??? Do you love yourself??? If not than ask why ???? what you don't like and change it for yourself and not because you want people to like you. and if you love yourself than screw them, you are beautiful and you know it !!! You are happy with yourself and that's all that matters.
      find friends who will love you just for who you are and make your own life.
      one day you will see someone sitting somewhere and staring at you with the same thought. and you will smile at him/her, remembering your past.
      The Second:
      you will find your way , just forget about everyone around you. forget where you are and who you are now. close your eyes and imagine what it looks like . your happiness. what it is? Family , job , money , power. who you want to be??? and than just believe in this believe in your happiness. and make that belief stronger than anything.
      In One tree hill there is an episode in 5 season . where in the end they re saying. " Make a wish and place it in your heart. anything you want everything you want . Do you have it? good. now believe it can come true. you never know where next miracle is gonna come from, the next smile, next wish come true." so find it and than believe in it!!!
      P.S
      I know you have no idea who i am , but believe me you will be a good person and you will try your best , you will get anything you want. I promise!!! Audrey said Nothing is impossible, word says "I'm Possible " so good luck !

      Delete
  75. Dear Joy!
    You're blog is amazing !I'm from Finland and me and my friend are totally in love oth. I hope that someday whole OTH group will be together in some tv-show..:) Oth change my whole world.. It helps me always when i'm sad or something is wrong my relationships.. I wish i could send you a fan letter.. but i cant find any address :/ It could be very nice, if you can post someday in here your blog, how Oth change your life? I'm not sure if you have it allready.. I hope that you can read this. I'm not very good in english.. but i try my best!
    Have a nice day to you !
    - Girl from Finland
    ps. I love your style and you are very beautifull!
    pps. I sent this on your blog post first..before i got that this could be better send in here:D

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  76. Hi Joy!
    You are such a role model to me, and someone who I have great respect for. I have been struggling these past few years with my relationship with my dad. We have never really ever had a relationdhip, basically he is just the man who takes me to school. Because of the hurt he has caused within me the past few years have been pretty dark fr me. I put up walls, and I am very depressed, not allowing anyone in, not trusting anyone, not even my family. I do not want my depression, and hurt over my dad consume my life and define me. I am only 17, am I suppose to be this depressed? I could really use your advice. Thanks!

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  77. Dear Joy,
    I live in South America where One Tree Hill is not aired. So, I found out about this show, just two weeks ago and decided to buy all of the seasons. I know it's kinda late because I know OTH ended like 23456 years ago, but right now I'm watching season 4 and Daunte hits you with his car! I can't stop crying over the fact that you might die, Lucas might die and most of all, I CAN'T STAND to see Nathan cry! So please, I know that this has nothing to do with personal advice but I would like to know if either Haley or Lucas die in this episode! :'(
    Sorry for the question but I'm a HUGE fan to Naley <3

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    Replies
    1. Dear Agustina,
      Naley's a true love. They would never ever be apart. And as far as Haley is concerned, She is fine till the last season. Lucas too gets well coz of Keith. Hope you find OTH interesting.
      Loads of love...!!

      Xoxo
      Bethany

      Delete
  78. Dear Joy!

    I just wanted to let you know that I have watched One Tree Hill since the day it premiered years and years ago. I have literally been watching it for half of my life, so it has a very special place in my heart.

    Because of this, I have seen each and every one of you actors change, grow up, etc. I realize the busy life you all have, and I was just wondering how in the world you find time to maybe relax, exercise, and even eat healthy. I know my life is busy, and it may not be to the extent of yours, but I'd like to consider myself always on the go, and I was wondering what I could do to balance this for the sake of my body.

    I love your style, and you are a TRUE role model to me.

    - Veasna

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  79. Hello Joy!
    For a long time one tree hill was my escape. Place to find answers to questions that bothered me, to find hope... to move on... feeling that everything gonna be okey... but now when all this is gone... I still have one unanswered question: How to understand what's your passion???
    I'm kind like Nathan(unlucky Nathan) All this time I was doing something my parents and family wanted , but now when i realised that it's not for me, what to do??? Nathan was/is lucky he loved basketball, but I don't love math. I'm good at it, but it's not for me. I mean I want something alive. to inspire people , help them. I want my job to be important not only for me. but I don't know what exactly it is??? so I have a question How you understand??? how you found your passion???
    P.S
    you are someone who inspires me :) someone who does something she loves and does it great:)

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  80. Dear Bethany,

    I have no idea if you will read this, but I'm a 26-year-old woman who admires you greatly. I recently wrote a blog entry about my eating disorder and you (http://recoveringanorexic.wordpress.com/2013/01/18/how-to-be-content/). I know that sounds silly when you first read that, but I'm currently in a tough spot and wanted to write about how you inspire me.

    I often read your blog and wonder how on earth you can be so humble and grounded in a world full of pain and suffering, and I can only hope that one day I can get back to a place where I too feel humble and grounded!

    As for a question -- can you share what things get you through tough times? What things have kept you so humble?

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  81. Dear Bethany,

    I have no idea if you will read this, but I'm a 26-year-old woman who admires you greatly. I recently wrote a blog entry about my eating disorder and you (recoveringanorexic(dot)wordpress(dot)com/2013/01/18/how-to-be-content/). I know that sounds silly when you first read that, but I'm currently in a tough spot and wanted to write about how you inspire me.

    I often read your blog and wonder how on earth you can be so humble and grounded in a world full of pain and suffering, and I can only hope that one day I can get back to a place where I too feel humble and grounded!

    As for a question -- can you share what things get you through tough times? What things have kept you so humble?

    ReplyDelete
  82. Dear Joy!

    Firstly, Thank you for such an honest and heart-felt blog! I am from South Africa, but staying in New York City to look after a very special little girl! I've been here for 14 month already, and can't believe I'm only going to be here for another 9 months! All your Blogs and Posts inspire me to be the individual I was born to be! To pause for little moments and to take nothing for granted! Your last post 'Opportunity' spoke to me even more than your other posts! And I am so THANKFUL for that! I've been playing around with the idea of Opening a specialized Early Enrichment Centre in South Africa, to improve our quality and care of Toddlers - I've had some very critical and harsh comments and pressure, some even from myself, doubting and disbelieving what I can achieve ... But I knew in my heart that every struggle and stress will be worth it once I've made a difference in even just one child's life! And your post has just inspired me even more! Thank you for posting what some are afraid to speak of!

    I do hope you carry on singing and release a CD soon enough! Hopefully I will see you in Concert before I head back home!

    Looking forward to your next post!
    Always stay the inspiration that you are!
    xxx
    Nathali
    P.S. ... Your Blog Matters.

    ReplyDelete
  83. Hello! I like reading your blog because you bring up good subjects and have interesting things to say, and honest oppinions - and intellegent ones.
    I read your last post - about the small buiseinessowners, and achievement and it caugth my interrest.
    Im a 20 year old girl from Sweden, and I find it really hard to be 20 years old! noone ever told me it was so confusing, not really knowing where you're headed or what you want to do. I'm the kind of person who likes to have a plan, and now I stand without one, and that's though! I really want to fulfill my dreams and fell accomplished, I want to work hard with something I love, I just have a hard time fihuring out what that is. Right now I just feel stuck and quite worthless to be honest.
    I guess I wanted to ask you - what did you dream of when you were 20? Where were you going? And how did you start? Were you confused? Or did you have a clear goal, and just went for it? What was most important to you 10 years ago?
    Thank you for taking time to read this. Jessica

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  84. Hi just wanted to say that I love your blog especially all the hair/fashion tips you give!!!!
    Please give us some new music soon #LOVEEVERLY and do a tour in Ireland if possible :)

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  85. Hello Bethany!
    First of all I would like to thank you for being in my life somehow, without you even knowing it. One Tree Hill changed my life and you being Haley too but what is more important, you being yourlsef changed my life. I will never have the words to thank you enough for inspire me with your music and everything you write. For teaching me to be myself and do what I like. I love reading your blog because it helps me to think about what I really want and how I really feel about myself, and that's incredible.
    I am from Spain and I hope you come here someday because one of my biggest dreams is to tell you all this face to face, I would be so happy...
    So, here's about I want to ask you, that is actually an advice I need. What would you say to someone who's dream is to study and live in New York because that person wants to study English to be a teacher or something like that... and that person lives in the other side of the world and can't really do much to make it come true. I really need your advice :)
    Thank you for reading this and I hope you answer.
    Kisses, Noelia.

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  86. Hi Bethany, my name is Anna. I am 17 years old and in high school about to graduate. One tree hill is my obsession, and a lot of topics discussed in One Tree Hill have given me perspective and inspiration. I need someone right now.. I need help. One of your recent tweets spoke to me. How if you think positive there will be positive outcomes. Well, I've been waiting to hear back from my dream school, and it is killing me. I don't think i'm good enough, or something good like getting in would never happen for me. How do I find the strength to know that I am good enough. I know you get a lot of messages, and it's so sweet you message people back, but I need that hope that i get from watching one tree hill. I probably sound like i'm having a pity party for myself. I just don't know how to find that confidence that all my work for these last four years mattered and that I am good enough. I just feel like I have terrible luck and that something good like that won't happen for me. How does one find the serenity and peace that you are good enough? I understand if you don't have the time to respond.. but you have no idea how this would make my life if you did..thank you so much for even possibly reading this. very truly yours, Anna

    ReplyDelete
  87. Hello there from Spain
    I LOVE THIS BLOG. It would be great to know your opinion about this

    My three years relationship finished a year and a half ago. Since that happened I have not been able to find the sense of life, I am nt me anymore, my dreams are long gone. He wont be back and I dnt think it could work if he did... Anyway, do you have any piece of advice for me?

    There are lots of good days but I feel something inside of me has gone forever. How can I have faith in life again? where are my dreams? I want to feel I have the control again

    My blog is in Spanish
    Volveraseryootravez.blogspot.com

    Lots of love and best wishes from a 30 years old girl

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You always have control. It's not something that you need to find. You have it and it's always been there whether it was three years ago or now. Your dreams are as strong as your true personality which NEVER changes. Your dreams may change but not who you are. Therefore, you always have control of who you are. I have never been in a long term relationship so I don't exactly know what you're going through. But I have asked myself these questions that you're asking yourself. You can never lose yourself, I believe in self discovery and it's a painful, confusing and tiring journey but its worth it. You just need something to believe in again and you'll find all the answers you're looking for. You may even realize that what you truly want was there all along.

      I don't know if what I said helped but there's just something in what you said inspired me to reply to your post. I hope you find what it is your looking for. Just believe again and watch yourself fly and watch your dreams fall into place

      x

      Delete
  88. Hello, Bethany ! I'm french and in France, One Tree Hill returns : I love it ! <3
    You have a beautiful voice and I would like you to come play in Brittany in my town : Fouesnant...
    I love you and I hope to ask me on this blog or in my email adress. You tell me !

    XOXO <3<3

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  89. Hello, Bethany ! I'm french and in France, One Tree Hill returns : I love it ! <3
    You have a beautiful voice and I would like you to come play in Brittany in my town : Fouesnant...
    I love you and I hope to ask me on this blog or in my email adress. You tell me !

    XOXO <3<3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I com from Briittany to :) To brest and I'm agree with this comment :)

      Delete
  90. I just wanted to say that you inspire me.

    Everyone goes through difficult times, but your music and your works of literary art, and your acting, has gotten me through those times.

    So I just wanted to say Thank you. Thank you for being a true inspiration.

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  91. Hi Bethany
    I just wanted to say hi I love your music and your a great mom and actress I love your music and I will always love one tree hill.

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  92. Hello I'm French I love your song and your movie I LOVE YOU !!!! TU ET BELLE

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  93. Hi Joie :)
    My name is Bec and im nearly 21 years old and live in Australia. Music has been a passion of mine my entire life and I've always wanted to pursue musical theatre in some form. A couple of years ago I moved interstate to study at JMC Academy, studying a bachelor of music (majoring in vocals). I've just started my final year at the Academy and Im having to start thinking about what the next step is for me. I really want to go to London to follow my dreams. I just don't know where to go next. I also feel like im at a cross roads with my faith. In feel like my relationship with God is dead at the moment and thats not how I want it to be at all. I have been to so many churches since i've moved and haven't found any that feel right for me. I just want to fit in somewhere and know that I can do this. I guess Im just scared. But I also want to say that you inspire me so much. I love your music so, so much. You inspire my life and my song writing. You are so incredibly talented and I really aspire to be someone as amazing as you. I hope you can reply to my message because I really just need some direction with where to go next and faith stuff. Thankyou so much Joie, x Bec

    ReplyDelete
  94. Hello Bethany! Excuse me, I'm French and I don't speak English very well! I hope that you will understand me!
    You are a moving person and humanely very intelligent! I admire you it! I like very much your voice and your songs! Where can we buy your records? I don't find them in France?! Thank you very much!
    My friendships!

    ReplyDelete
  95. Hi,

    My name is Jess and I have been a huge fan of Joy and One Tree Hill ever since the show premiered when I was 13. I'm 22 now and am medically morbidly obese. I was always a little heavier growing up; however, I was never overweight until probably college. I'm here for a little advice. I just don't have the motivation to try to get myself in better shape. I feel as if it's never going to happen so why even try? However, I have to do something. I know Joy was never obese, overweight, or anything remotely close. As long as I've seen her on my TV screen she's looked absolutely perfect. She did do an incredible job getting her body even better than it was before she had Maria. I believe I'm the same height as Joy, maybe a little shorter. I don't know how big or small my frame is, but I can tell you it has a lot of fat on it. Does anyone know what method Joy used to get into the shape she's in? I know exercise and eating right, but does anyone know specifics?

    Thanks,

    Jess

    ReplyDelete
  96. Hello
    I am French and I love your voice that I discovered in one tree hill and since I listening loop ^ ^ You are my inspiration when everything goes well I listen halo or flying machine, but when things go wrong listening leaving town alive I love your work you are awesome and continue I must admit that as a big fan I would like to talk with you but you are so take my facebook ^ ^ Dany tony tony Shaolan

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  97. hello joy! I am one of your biggest fans, here in France we appreciate and we hope to show, we are much appreciated your music and hope to see you come visit our beautiful country. Too bad you're so far away. My daughter Savannah sings many songs you she loves you 4 years and all with me. here I hope to hear from you dearly =) sorry if you do not understand everything I do not speak very little English that =)

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  98. Hello Bethany!

    I am one of your hundreds and hundreds of adoring fans! I found one tree hill when I really needed something to lift my soul, and that's exactly what it's done, through all these years. I've always looked up to Haley as a beautiful spirit who stands strong in her faith, ideas, dreams, and pursuits, and who has a compassionate soul, able to love each person in her life in the exact way they need. I know this can't simply be acted, so I truly look up to YOU!

    One tree hill is truly an important part of my life, and who I am! As I've grown up with one tree hill, I too have looked up to the love between Nathan and Haley. I've always loved their love. I just expected to find it someday; it's something my soul has always longed for. Now as a Freshman in college, I feel like the reality of life has finally set in. I'm no longer anticipating and dreaming, people and places and dreams are actually happening. With this, I've been so sad. Nathan and Haley's love is still in the back of my mind; that sweet, even scratchy at times, bold, beautiful love. For months I've been tossing around the question, is that love possible in our world here? And if it is, how can you possibly find it, and what does it even look like, if you are to find it. I wouldn't even be disappointed to know that it doesn't exist, I just truly want to know how something so beautiful and contented could be made up, in real life.

    And so, I thought going right to the source would be the best option (: You've experienced both. You have participated in the love I hold so close to my heart, yet you live in this world with all of us as well.

    You have beautiful words, and you are a beautiful person. Thank you so much for sharing both.

    I'll be praying for your little pumpkin as she grows older, and for you as you continue to use your talents and explore the world.

    Thank you for your impact in my life!
    -Lydia

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  99. Hello Bethany,

    I'm Torlynn, all the way from India. Nothing new to say that I'm one of ur biggest fans, rather the show 'One Tree Hill'. I was very upset on the ending of the show, since me & my mom regularly used to watch it for the 9 long years. It all began when I was a little girl, and now I'm aging 16. A good fact is the whole show is re-premiering from 27th feb. in India in 'star world' channel. It's pretty amazing to get u all back again. YOU and all ur co-stars were fabulous: Sophia Bush, Hilarie Burton, Chad Michael Murray, James Lafferty, etc. etc..
    By the way u have a great voice. your "Halo" is one of my favourite songs. In total you are great. While surfing through the net, I saw your cute little daughter "Maria"; she is so sweet.
    I thank you so much for creating such a site where u can devote at least a little bit of ur precious time to the fans like us. And it feels really good to comprehend with you. I don't really know what else to say, but hope you will surely read this mail.
    "Life is not a bed of roses...": I think it's the latent message that the show OTH wanted to convey, cuz I can feel it now; it's much more easier to understand while you grow up, and so am I. Whatever, life has all it's essence and all you have to do is to enjoy every second of it.
    Anyways, once again I would like to mention that I really honour you for whatever works you had done, you are doing, and I only pray to almighty to guide you to your best. I love you <3<3<3!!!....

    With love
    Torlynn.

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  100. Hi Bethany !
    I'm 15 years old and I'm French. I discovered you in the series One Tree Hill. It's ma favourite series because it changes my life. You have changed my life. I always listen your songs. Your songs help myself. My twin sister is dead in a car accident. I regained hope thanks to your role in OTH and your songs. I believe in my dreams now thanks to you. Thank you very much. I love you.
    When you come in France ?
    Xoxo
    La.

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  101. Hello, Bethany! I am french, my name is Chloé. I love Haley. Your voice is fantastic (Halo, Feel This...)
    So, I love you. I want to meet you it's my dream.
    I hope to ask me! I love you
    "Je vous adore!(baby mama)Mon rêve est de vous rencontrer. Je suis comme le personage d'Haley"
    Chloé!!!

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  102. I am such a huge fan and I love Haley on OTH. The show would not be the same without her. Your character on OTH gave me confidence and every now and then I wish I had someone like Haley to talk to. I was just rewatching season seven and I realized how great of an actress you were and how OTH has a ton of leading ladies. On the episode where your mom dies I cry everytime just seeing your face in those scenes. I appreciate you for staying on OTH for nine seasons and I hope that you are somewhat like Haley because that gives me hope. Everytime I hear your name I think about Haley off OTH and hope you acquire her traits; I imagine you do. Sometimes when I'm alone I pretend to talk to you and that we are best friends. OTH has given girls such strength and something to believe in. I was devastated to hear it was over but I guess that's why I have all the seasons to rewatch. I feel close to you even though I don't know you. I hope to one day meet you; the person who inspired me to take risks and follow dreams and not be afraid. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  103. Hi--
    I am absolutely in love with your music and try to go wherever I can to get my hands on it. I've been doing extensive research about your discography and music career to see which of your music is available for purchase, on itunes, etc.
    I loved your cover of "Elsewhere" by Sarah McLachlan from the show a while back (Ten years?) and tried to find a full version. My efforts were fruitless until a friend of mine gave it to me from an album called "Joy" and said that her friend had given it to her years prior. This confused me because I had not seen this album anywhere before, (if it even exists?) and had heard that "Elsewhere" was never available for purchase. Thought I would clear up confusion and go straight to the source! I would love to hear back from you, thank you so much.

    ReplyDelete
  104. Hi Bethany,
    I don't know how this works, but I really am hoping I get to hear back from you. I started watching One Tree Hill, skeptically my Senior Year. I guess I just thought it was another TV show. But after watching, I feel like it has become something I can so deeply relate to or something I can use as an escape when I have a bad day.
    The show (as you know I'm sure) is so much more than any other TV show. It deals with real life issues, it targets a teenage audience and shows us how to persevere even when it feels like all is lost. To fight for our dreams when we feel like its time we give up.
    When I was 8 years old, I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease. It is not a glamorous disease and sometimes I hide behind it. It's something that has taken me the past 11 years to really adjust to. A lot of my life I have struggled with confidence and self worth because of this disease now inflicting my body.
    This TV show did so much more than you could ever imagine. It showed me that I am beautiful, I have worth and that I am confident. I do not let my disease define me.
    I guess if I had one question for you, is how do you deal with it all? All the fame, all the craziness and still manage to hold yourself with such confidence and poise? Any secret tips? :)
    Thanks for reading!

    ReplyDelete
  105. Hi Joy! Im a 20 years old girl from Italy..this morning I was watching some videos on youtube about one tree hill e suddenly I was crying so hard..I can't stand One tree hill is over!I'm writing just to let you know that all of you have done an incredible job over the years..I'm in love with One tree hill since I was 13 and I want you to always remember that you are all still in my heart, even though the show is over a year ago! You have changed your fan's lives and you have taught us to believe in our dreams! You have taught us the power of love, friendship, forgivness and redemption and I'm so gratefull to have grown with you. Every single time I watch a One tree hill episode I feel at home and it would be amazing if all of you came to Italy to meet your beloved fans! I wanted to write you to let you know that what you do matter!
    With all my heart
    Giulia

    ReplyDelete
  106. Hi! I am from Latvia! You are so beautiful, generous and.... fantastic woman!!! I am glad to write you! It is a pity that One tree hill is over. I wish you just good things and i hope you will find your love~
    Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  107. Just read the news about Dexter! Congratulations! Love, Love, Love Dexter- Started watching it with a former exchange student that my husband I hosted. Eeeee! Excited!

    ReplyDelete
  108. Hey Bethany,
    my name is Jasi, i'm from germany and 14 years old.
    One tree hill means so much to me, especially your role as Haley.
    I love your music really and your voice is incredible!
    You are so beautiful and i have already send textes to you on facebook but you don't answer :(
    I love you and hope once you will answer!

    Love greetings, Jasi<3

    ReplyDelete
  109. Hey Bethany,
    my name is Jasi, i'm from germany and 14 years old.
    One tree hill means so much to me, especially your role as Haley.
    I love your music really and your voice is incredible!
    You are so beautiful and i have already send textes to you on facebook but you don't answer :(
    I love you and hope once you will answer!

    Love greetings, Jasi<3

    ReplyDelete
  110. Hey Bethany Joy!

    I have a question. And would love to get a response here so others with the same problem can read it too.
    I'm 23, and always battling to feel like a woman.
    It's kind of hard since I can't feel beautiful or worthy.
    I think most of that problem comes because I never got breasts.
    I don't even have an A cup and many times I try to use clothes that gives the illusion that my breasts are bigger.
    I never go without a bra, though all the bras are to big for me.
    It's really hard to shop because nothing fits, they are either to big a cleavage and fits everywhere else, or just to small/big.

    I feel it's a battle to be a woman when small things also fight against me. I'm not really in to fashion and make-up, so it's hard to find something that is me.
    With make-up I go for natural, but sometimes I put red lipstick on, that helps a lot. (But then I get comments about the red lips, some people just don't have manners). I like red lips, so I don't care what people say. And the hair never grows long anymore, kind of making me feel even less a girl.

    Do you have any advice?
    You always look perfect, even natural, smart and down to earth.
    And your hair grows really fast. How do you do that?
    If anyone could make me feel better, it's you.

    I'm just sick of this feeling.
    Are we less of a woman just because we don't have the perfect size and body in any part and shape?
    No! So why do I have to feel like it?

    Anyway, I love you Bethany, never change!

    Xoxo
    Sandra :)

    ReplyDelete
  111. Hey Bethany,
    my name is Jasi, i'm from germany and 14 years old.
    One tree hill means so much to me, especially your role as Haley.
    I love your music really and your voice is incredible!
    You are so beautiful and i have already send textes to you on facebook but you don't answer :(
    I love you and hope once you will answer!

    Love greetings, Jasi<3

    ReplyDelete
  112. Hello Bethany Joy! First let me say that you are my total role model! I love your style and morals and really everything! Well, what I wanted to ask you was: Could you do a blog post or even a video of your different hair styles? I love the side braid that you do and also the light waves that you have! My hair is pretty wavy but its not as controlled. I don't know if you use some sort of iron or if its natural. Maybe you could do the hair styles with your wardrobe wednesday?

    -Samantha :)

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  113. I watch One Tree Hill over and over and over again, I literally think I have watched it a million times.. You are my favorite actor. You guys are the best i've seen. I'm not kidding 'One Tree Hill' is my all time favorite show.. My parents always get mad at me because I never come out of my room because i'm watching it. It will NEVER get old. I have youtube videos of me singing, It's under 'Amberly Purdy singing.'
    I play guitar and sing, and i'm a christian! But I get bullied sooooooo much, i'm a freshman and it's been going on for years! It never stops, i've tried killing myself, cutting myself and everything.. I was crazy, but once I saw One Tree Hill on tv, man your character taught me threw EVERYTHING! I want to be just like you!! No joke.. Thanks for being one heck of an enjoyable and amazing actor and singer.. I wish you were my mom.. YOU'RE PERFECT.♥ Jamie in the show was soooo lucky, and your kid in real life is even more lucky. You're my inspiration, i read all your poems and listen to your songs. You're GORGEOUS, BEAUTIFUL, STRONG, CARING, LOVING, FUNNY, TALENTED, INSPIRATIONAL, WARM AND KIND HEARTED, AND WAYYYYY MORE.♥ I'll try to catch my dream of singing or play basketball.. Hope you read this... I really would LOVE LOVE LOVE to meet you and the cast, but more you.. I'd bawl!! But a goood bawl!
    -Amberly Purdy.♥

    ReplyDelete
  114. Dear BJL,
    I wrote to you earlier about my confusions in self discovery and how lately I've not been feeling like myself and I don't know why I feel like that. Not that I've found answers or been able to understand what this feeling is; in fact I can't even describe it. I guess I just lie awake asking myself if I will ever find answers to any of my questions. But I do have one question which I know everyone asks themselves all the time; will we ever find love?
    Every girl has asked herself this, and if any girl has found love she knows how lucky she is. But I have never found it nor experienced it and I'm only 18 which means I have the rest of my life ahead of me but I fear that I will never experience this fairy tale romance which I know everyone deserves at least once in their life. We all deserve to be loved and to be happy. So, will I ever be that lucky? Will I ever find it?

    x

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  115. Hey Bethany! I´m from Austria and I´m a big fan of you and ,One Tree Hill´! I love your songs and your voice. So I would like to know if you still have concerts anywhere? And if you have ever been in Austria?
    I have my own little fan-homepage of ,One Tree Hill`.. So if you have time you could have a look on it! Here is the adress: http://www.palimpalem.com/8/OneTreeHill/
    I hope you could write back!

    ReplyDelete
  116. Hey Bethany! I´m from Austria and I´m a big fan of you and ,One Tree Hill´!! I love your voice and your style! I would like to know if you still have concerts anywhere? And if you have ever been in Austria?
    I have my own little fan-homepage of ,One Tree Hill´ and i would love if you could have a view on it :D
    here is the adress: http://www.palimpalem.com/8/OneTreeHill/
    I hope you could write back and i love you and ,One Tree Hill´ too!!
    xoxo, Julia

    ReplyDelete
  117. Dear Bethany Joy,

    My name is Rick Galvin and I am a NYC fireman who this past May I did a 5 K run in my FDNY bunker gear and will be doing so again this May 4th in honor of my mother whom I lost when I was 11 years old and since that point and time I was searching for a way to honor my mother and make up for not being by her bedside the night she passed away These events give me one night to make it right and it is very important to me to try and make it so no other kid shall have to face the choice I did and then let that one night haunt them. Not only did I do the run I also held a fundraising event where we had a fashion show along with press and many celebrities in attendance where all the proceeds went to Bright Pink. This event is our third and will be our best one yet and I am writing you to invite you to join our fight. I hope you can come out and support our mission to raise awareness and money for this important cause on May 8th 2013 @ 7pm. Thanks for your time and all the best.

    Sincerely,
    Rick Galvin
    845-304-8962
    galvinfundraiser@gmail.com
    http://www.facebook.com/InHonorOfCarolGalvinFundraiserEvents?ref=stream


    http://www.musicnewsnashville.com/frealane-tp-play-benefit-for-bright-pink-in-nyc?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=frealane-tp-play-benefit-for-bright-pink-in-nyc

    http://fashion.broadwayworld.com/article/Designers-Jenn-Burgos-and-Shakeema-Thomas-and-More-Set-for-IN-HONOR-OF-CAROL-GALVIN-Benefit-for-Bright-Pink-58-20130401

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  118. Love, love, love your music. Is there a way to get a copy of what you sing in One Tree Hill, love, love, love it! Lynnrio@msn.com

    ReplyDelete
  119. Hello!
    I am a young mom and I gained a lot of weight during my pregnancy. (25 kilos) I have 10 kilos to be lost. How to accept her body after the childbirth(delivery)? Thank you

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  120. Hi Bethany, I loved One tree Hill. Im from Canada. I miss the show but what I appreciated about the show so much was that it related to teens, and adults. You could actually learn something from it.

    <3

    Shelby

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  121. Hi Bethany,
    my name is jasi, i'm 14 and from germany.
    I want to say you how beautiful you are. I really like your hair, your eyes, your voice...
    And I think you are a proud and very good mother.
    My biggest wish is to meet you one time.. but it's impossible
    Every day I enjoy your awesome music.
    You are a very good actress every time when I look at one tree hill I am impresst how good you can bring over your role as Haley.
    I really want a autograph from you! I hope there's any chance to get one!

    Once Haley said 'Belive that deams come true everyday. Because they do.'
    And I belive that this satement is true and I belive in it!
    I always belive that once i will meet you <3

    love greetings jasi <3

    ReplyDelete
  122. Hi, first of all I'd like to thank you for doing this. My name is Cassie and I am a 17 year old girl in a small country town. My life consist of my family school and art. I just wanted to thank you! I have just recently gotten involved in watchin One Tree Hill, but I really conected with your character from the beginning. (though I don't have a hot best friend and all the drama your character has), I have always been the smart nerdy girl that nobody likes. and it sucks, I grew up being bullied at school and at home, so I never had much of a self esteem.

    OK, I am mainly here because well I have been trying to lose weight, and I don't have any motivation. I want to be beautiful, I think all the time that I am never going to be anyones "someone special", but with your character as Haley, It showed me that I can be. You should me that there is someone out there for everyone.

    I am just glad that I had some one to look to. Sometimes it just sucks that there is no one there for me. Well instead of complaining I am going to just say your great in every way, I just love you. Thanks!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, Cassie. Life is an extremely interesting thing, we as human beings aspire towards goals such as becoming more attractive, finding love or even riches. The truth is that I am younger than you, probably more naive and I have no experience in romance, other than what I have read, watched on television and witnessed for myself.The point I am trying to make is that in our generation the social aspect of life is so important that it cannot be left out, and things such as insecurity, confidence and romance are things that we will get to experience at some point in our lives. Confidence in yourself is not something other people can give you, and unfortunately, most people do not feel the need to make other people feel better about themselves. What I believe is the first step about liking yourself is that when you look in the mirror, instead of focusing on the things you dislike about yourself, finding things that you believe to be good qualities in yourself can really make a change in your mindset. The second step is to not believe everything that people say about you and try to filter out all the bullshit that social media is telling you. Are we really supposed to think that the models on the runway are attractive? women with no self esteem that starve themselves and never achieve something that have some real meaning to life. I am not saying that all models are like this, because truly I believe that there must be some amazing human beings in that genre, but how many people in the world actually look like that in real life. Us as fans of One Tree Hill are lucky because even though the cast are all beautiful people, they have shown us again and again that there is something more than beauty and material goods. Now as I do not know who you are, and I have never seen you before in my life I cannot make any judgements about your looks, but my advice to you is to be healthy, sacrificing yourself for an impossible goal is not beneficial. And for the boy thing, men will always love women who are confident in themselves and if they do not like you, they're loss. Besides you're 17 not 80 and there is lots of time to worry about them later :)
      Hope you find this useful, and if any people find something in this comment offensive, I apologize that was not my intention.

      Anonymous

      Delete
  123. Hi Joy!

    I am Stephanie, I am from New York and i am a huge fan! I love your work as Haley of course :). You taught me to be a strong independent woman and follow your dreams. Which is what i am working on in college at the moment. I was just wondering, do you have any advice on finding the right guy and finding true love?
    I am sometimes having trouble with it. I really want to find him, i have dated two boys in the past but i wasn't ready or i wasn't attracted to him. If you could reply to me that would be wonderful :3

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  124. Can you give us some healthy food tips?!?!

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  125. Hi Bethany,

    I Think it is wonderful you are getting girls to ask for advice on this blog. I recently broke up with a long term boyfriend after almost two years. I lived with him so things in terms of belongings and our pets have been stressful to deal with. Finally reached an agreement on things. He lied to me over and over and I feel now like I am having trouble trusting people with my heart and opening up my feelings to them. Is this normal and how do I get my faith in love and trust back ?

    Xoxo. Priyanka

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Of course that's normal! Anybody in your situation would react in the same way, and probably handle it with less class and grace. All you have to do is give your heart time to heal. I promise you, it will heal, and once it does it'll be stronger and better than ever. You'll know when it's time to start letting people in again.

      Delete
  126. Hello, Bethany!

    Although I think with your busy life, you might just read past this, I still want to share my thoughts to you.

    I am Mikee Alvero, a Filipino, a recently-turned fan of One Tree Hill and I admire how much you portrayed your role well. Haley is one of the random names I wish was mine and I'm glad you gave justice to it. Haha. If there was something I look forward to in every episode of OTH, it would be the Naley scenes. It's just so romantic and exciting. I cried when you cried, I was hurt when you were hurt and my heart skips a bit every time you and Nathan kiss.

    Because your role enticed me so much, I wanted to get to know who you were off screen. I came upon this and it is beyond amazing. I was overwhelmed and I now have more appreciation and respect over you. This site of yours is truly a good way to keep connected to your fans and even relaying to us your real life role as a mother --one more thing I really appreciate about you.

    I think it is an audacious thing for you to share your talent in music, writing, acting, parenting, and everything else. Keep it up! You deserved a real standing ovation for being such a great person. I have found myself an idol, a role model. I badly want to meet you, talk to you in person, or simply get to know you better for I have seen so much goodness in you.

    I have a lot of questions I want to ask but I want to start with: Is it possible that we become good friends even if we're thousands of miles apart? I really do want to get to know you even more. Just let me know!

    Congratulations on all your successes! Goodluck with everything! Keep reaching for your goals, keep inspiring people like me and keep on smiling! God Bless you!

    Cheers! I hope to hear from you soon!

    XOXO, Mikee

    Twitter: @thisismikeea
    Wordpress: gottohavesomethingtokeepustogether.wordpress.com
    Email: mikhaela1296@yahoo.com

    P.S. I like your name, "Bethany Joy". Joy is my second name too. Hihi.

    ReplyDelete
  127. Hey Bethany, I am of course a massive fan, but it was not because of everything that happened but the effect of the person. I am having trouble with life, and I seem to have lost most of my confidence that I rarely talk to anyone outside of friends or knowable, I got out of my shyness last summer and all of a sudden after my best friend walking out on me I don't like talking to others yet, I have so much to say. I guess I miss them, but have you any advice for my personality to grow because I just feel more useless and I think that when I go off to college I'll make new friends and a fresh start, but what if I don't? Thanks anyways xxx

    ReplyDelete
  128. hello bethany, my name is hayley, i just wanted to say how much i idolize you and let you know how much me and your character has in common, any way, i kind of need serious help and i have no one else to talk to so please when you get a chance can you contact me urgently i dont want to post it thank you
    www.facebook.com/hayleyy.louisex.5
    please im feeling so alone right now

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  129. Hi Joy, where are you? I hope you're fine. Miss your posts! :( I look every day and hope reading anything new.
    XOXO
    Julia

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  130. u r an amazing actress.....good expressions which are very hard to find in present actors....wish you luck :)

    ReplyDelete
  131. Hi Bethany,
    my name is Deborah and I'm Italian, I live in Modena you know?
    I'm 27 ... I'm late to write to you? :)
    I just wanted to say that your voice kidnapped me, I wanted to compliment you because now I'm trying to get to know you through all these social networks, I like you even more, you are a sunny person, even a little crazy in a good way of course :) .
    I admire you because you are as you are, simple.
    I would have really wanted to know why I think you're a wonderful person, and after what happened to you lately you've expanded your courage and the strength that was brought out in you.
    Never change and entertain us and live your days through your photos.
    If you want to get a ride in Italy call me heheh debby_usa@libero.it
    a kiss
    (sorry for English little English)
    Debby

    ReplyDelete
  132. I'm really glad I came across this site. I can confidently say that One Tree Hill has changed me. The show made me take a different perspective on life, love and family and friends. It made me think about what kind of person I want to be and what really matters in life. As a teenager I often struggle with self-image and the questions of what comes next and what really defines me.

    High school is not easy and it's hard watching everyone breeze through high school and enjoy themselves when I am not and I am struggling.
    Seeing the characters struggle but come out on the other side stronger than before and growing throughout the series made me realize that high school does not define us. Your life in high school is so completely different from what life will be in the future and this is oftentimes forgotten.

    But watching One Tree Hill taught me that it gets better and high school really does not define you. Who you are as a person, and your morals and your heart define you. And for that lesson I am grateful. So I guess my questions were answered by what I got from watching One Tree Hill.

    And by reading previous posts I know I am not the only person that feels this way and I believe that says something about this TV show.

    ReplyDelete
  133. Hi, Joy. I am from Serbia (Europe). Just listen to your songs and I just wanted you to know that people here love like there. A few years ago I felt completely lost, then I found One Tre Hill and my life has changed completely. This show teach me to be better person.Teach me how to love, how to laugh, how to live,how see difference between right and wrong. This show saved my life and I am forever thankful for thet,and not just for show, but the actors especially you and Sophia. I would like to one day get to America and meet you and all actors from One Tree Hill.

    x.o.x.o Jana <3

    ReplyDelete
  134. Hi Bethany,
    my name is Deborah and I'm Italian, I live in Modena you know?
    I'm 27 ... I'm late to write to you? :)
    I just wanted to say that your voice kidnapped me, I wanted to compliment you because now I'm trying to get to know you through all these social networks, I like you even more, you are a sunny person, even a little crazy in a good way of course :) .
    I admire you because you are as you are, simple.
    I would have really wanted to know why I think you're a wonderful person, and after what happened to you lately you've expanded your courage and the strength that was brought out in you.
    Never change and entertain us and live your days through your photos.
    If you want to get a ride in Italy call me heheh debby_usa@libero.it
    a kiss
    (sorry for English little English)
    Debby

    ReplyDelete
  135. Hi Bethany,
    my name is Deborah and I'm Italian, I live in Modena you know?
    I'm 27 ... I'm late to write to you? :)
    I just wanted to say that your voice kidnapped me, I wanted to compliment you because now I'm trying to get to know you through all these social networks, I like you even more, you are a sunny person, even a little crazy in a good way of course :) .
    I admire you because you are as you are, simple.
    I would have really wanted to know why I think you're a wonderful person, and after what happened to you lately you've expanded your courage and the strength that was brought out in you.
    Never change and entertain us and live your days through your photos.
    If you want to get a ride in Italy call me heheh debby_usa@libero.it
    a kiss
    (sorry for English little English)
    Debby

    ReplyDelete
  136. Hey Joy
    I am a HUGE fan of the show One Tree Hill and you are a huge inspiration to me my biggest dream is to get a chance to meet you, I would be so happy if i could please get back to me at
    red.dumond@live.ca

    ReplyDelete
  137. Hi Bethany,
    I'm a huge fan of your character in OTH as Haley and your music especially "Halo" and "Songs in my Pockets." I am Anuja Thapa and a huge fan of OTH and am very sad that it ended. You and Nathan make a great couple!
    Cheers,
    Anuja xo

    ReplyDelete
  138. Hey Bethany , I just wqant to say that I never flirt with a boy and I'm still virgin
    I promised to keep my virginity until marriage Do you think it's the right choice ?
    BTW : I'm crazy about you and jAMES Lafferty
    But I know that I will never see you :( :( Fuck ly life right ?

    ReplyDelete
  139. hey Joy,

    words are not enough to express what i feel. i love you

    be blessed and wish you the best in your family! bzuuu

    ReplyDelete
  140. Im currently on season 8 Ep 18 of OTH I remember when my friend told me to start watching this show 7 months ago. As my journey through OTH i've never learned so many life lessons before especially from Haley..

    Anyways so advice for everyone. Be a fool, make mistakes sometimes but learn from them because a fool is all you could ever be. Be yourself always never change no matter what people say. When there comes a time where you feel lost.. put your mind back in place and stand tall and go out there and over come everything you can. We dont have much time in the world and i realized that a couple months ago when my dad found out he had stage 4 cancer. My life's been a roller coaster trust me.. but i am getting through it by the help of good friends, family, ice skating and of course OTH and you Bethany :) so be you and just dont worry because you'll be okay I promise

    if anyone needs anything my twitter name is @emspeng13 im here for you. always.

    ReplyDelete
  141. Hello Bethany , Hello Joy! Thank you for doing that, this is a good way to be closer to your fans and for girls, have a real woman (and wonderful mother btw) that can advice . I want to ask you something stupid I'm still virgin and I never kissed someone . :$ Like Haley James
    Is it a good thing to keep my virginity ? Thank you
    BTW : I admire you too much and if you see James Lafferty tell him that his perfect (l)I'm her biggest fan
    Have fun !
    E-mail : rais.Salma@hotmail.fr

    ReplyDelete
  142. Hi , I'm a guy posting here, Is that a crime?

    ReplyDelete
  143. Where to start...
    I am a 15 year old girl. My parents have been divorced since i was about 1 year old. I go back and forth to their house all time. I just recently realized that not everybody has the perfect relationship. It just hit me that my parents are divorced. They will never be with eachother ever again. I have always been open to love, and love at first sight. But now im really scared. What if i end up like my parents. What if i don't end up "happily ever after". Not having parents who lived together has just been a way of life for me. I never even thought twice about their love for eachother at one time. What if im the reason that they didn't work out?

    P.S. Just getting the chance to write this out and tell you how i feel has helped me out a lot. Thank you so much for the oppurtunity to express myself.

    ReplyDelete
  144. So, i want say you: WHY YOU'RE SO PRETTY ?!
    Yes you're verry beautiful haha.

    I watched One tree hill, it was my favorite series ( it's "series" in English no ? I'm French)

    I love your style too. Pants, shirts ALL ! Amazing, voice, amazing face, amazing style, Are you perfect ? hihi :P

    This message for said (in french) : JE T'AIME ! ♥ @alx_horan

    ReplyDelete
  145. So I don't typically do this but here it goes. I guess I never realized how much I connected to OTH until watching the whole series. I just graduated college and guess I can understand it more at this age. So firstly, thank you for that.
    Secondly, I saw that you support some activist organizations and I was wondering if you have ever looked into V-Day, this organization was created by Eve Ensler who wrote The Vagina Monologues. I produced and directed TVM for two years at Baldwin Wallace University (hopefully leaving behind a message and a successor to take over). I simply think it would be of interest to you. http://www.vday.org/home
    Can't wait to see you do more great things.

    ReplyDelete
  146. Good evening Bethany,

    I have a question which brule me lips for a long time,

    Why you are not known in France? Personally I knew you by the television series " ONE TREE HILL " but nobody know you as singer

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  147. Hi! Joy i just want to say i'm a huge fan of yours and i love music and singing just as much as you. I'm fourteen and going into high school. You are my biggest role model. You seem like a down to earth person. I know you might never read this because you are busy with your life, but I just need someone to talk to because nobody understands what I want for my life. I am a really spirited person and I believe dreams can become reality if your a hard worker. I love to sing more than anything and my friends say that I have a good voice. I've been singing since i was 3 just around the house and by myself. I play the piano and I want to learn how to play guitar. I just need a voice teacher to develop it more to become even better. I'm finding a teacher right now. My dream job would to become a singer and a songwriter just like you, but I don't want to become famous or change my beliefs I just want to sing. My mom doesn't want me to pursue that dream because she thinks it would be a problem financially. I just want to know, how did you do it. How did you become a singer. You really inspired me. I can tell your a really good person. The people around me in my life just think that education is all that matters. I know its important, but what matters truly is to do what you love. I loved your character Haley on One Tree Hill. She reminds me of myself... except I'm not a nerd lol, but she gives people the benefit of the doubt. You have to sell out your old albums I love all of your music I can't download it on my ipod its sad. Also you should make more music too. I love your name by the way Bethany Joy. In the future if I had a daughter I would name her that.I hope you read this, it would really mean a lot to me if you reply. If you do thank you for your time to write back.
    Hope to hear from you,
    love - Sophie

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  148. Hi! Joy i just want to say i'm a huge fan of yours and i love music and singing just as much as you. I'm fourteen and going into high school. You are my biggest role model. You seem like a down to earth person. I know you might never read this because you are busy with your life, but I just need someone to talk to because nobody understands what I want for my life. I am a really spirited person and I believe dreams can become reality if your a hard worker. I love to sing more than anything and my friends say that I have a good voice. I've been singing since i was 3 just around the house and by myself. I play the piano and I want to learn how to play guitar. I just need a voice teacher to develop it more to become even better. I'm finding a teacher right now. My dream job would to become a singer and a songwriter just like you, but I don't want to become famous or change my beliefs I just want to sing. My mom doesn't want me to pursue that dream because she thinks it would be a problem financially. I just want to know, how did you do it. How did you become a singer. You really inspired me. I can tell your a really good person. The people around me in my life just think that education is all that matters. I know its important, but what matters truly is to do what you love. I loved your character Haley on One Tree Hill. She reminds me of myself... except I'm not a nerd lol, but she gives people the benefit of the doubt. You have to sell out your old albums I love all of your music I can't download it on my ipod its sad. Also you should make more music too. I love your name by the way Bethany Joy. In the future if I had a daughter I would name her that.I hope you read this, it would really mean a lot to me if you reply. If you do thank you for your time to write back.
    Hope to hear from you,
    love - Sophie

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  149. Hi:) I'm typing to you from South Africa - though I am sure this is under-whelming...regardless, I have admired and celebrated your work, in all it's capacities, for so many years. Regrettably, we don't get much international music/shows/productions etc. so I am surely missing out on a plethora of your other works.

    Anyway, my point is, perhaps the two most salient impacts in my life personally are your songs (your lyrics, words, inspirations, passion) and your role in One Tree Hill (your character's story was my story; her journey seemed to depict aspects of mine). The narratives you share, the love you put into every creative has imparted on me a love and a passion and an appreciation for all that is magical and tragic about existence. The discourses/narratives you shared helped me re-author and re-story the grand narrative of my life. I am sure you have had this same impact on a sea of people from all backgrounds, ethnicities, cultures, colours, creeds; so mine is not a unique appreciation. But it is a personal one; one that has meant the world when I was a young adult and now. At 31, I am watching my OTH box set (a box set I hope to share with my children someday) and still it is relevant today.
    Your work echoes forever in the hearts of every man, woman and child privileged enough to experience it; for that I am truly blessed and eternally grateful. Your music stirs within me a happiness and a joy and showers blessing upon blessing upon me. Also, as a clinical psychologist here, I appreciate your willingness to guide, assist, almost mentor young women; and so, it is clear that you as person have so much depth, kindness and love that no story could be able to capture perfectly and as deeply (although your character sure is a good representation of it). It is simply wonderful to see a character with depth played by an artist with depth, because so often this isn't the case.
    Simply put, Thank you! for all that you are and all that you do!

    A friend in South Africa, if ever you need/want one,
    Simone
    simonevanhorick@gmail.com
    +27822112771

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  150. LOVE146 - tragic and amazing all at once. So inspirational the work you do. I am an intern clinical psychologist so I cannot contribute financially but please let me know what other options are available; I'd like to help if I am able!!

    Simone
    simonevanhorick@gmail.com
    +27822112771

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  151. by the way, your video for songs in my pockets is amazing - so natural, fun, authentic...I do the same things, I'm a dork I admit it...lol.. ok enough of my fragmented comments :)

    Simone
    simonevanhorick@gmail.com
    +27822112771

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  152. Hi Bethany. I am 20 years old and a big fan of the show One Tree Hill and you are my favorite character. Haley is such an inspiring, strong caring woman and a very talented musician. I loved the caring and unbreakable relationship that Haley had with Nathan in the show as well. I plan to visit Wilmington some day and hope to see some places where the show was filmed. I think that would be awesome! You are such a wonderful role model to young women. I love to sing and record songs and it would mean the world to me if a talented and respected musician like you would have a listen to it and maybe leave your opinion. You are a successful musician and some professional advice would be awesome! Thank you for all of the laughs and all of the cries from One Tree Hill; a show that touches the heart.

    https://soundcloud.com/courtneybrushett/last-kiss-cover-final
    https://soundcloud.com/courtneybrushett/goodbye-my-lover-3
    https://soundcloud.com/courtneybrushett/the-a-team-cover

    Thank you so much for your inspiration and I hope to see you someday down the road. All the best.

    Courtney Brushett
    courtney_brushett@hotmail.com

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  153. Hey Joy!

    Greetings from Colombo, Sri Lanka. I have been an ardent follower of yours ever since your portrayal of Haley on One Tree Hill. Trust me when I say that you and your co-stars especially James are gifted actors. I know that all the cast and crew were the reason behind the success of the show and I am indebted to all of you for making us happy and for inspiring us to follow our dreams.

    I am a freelance writer by profession and I have always done commercial write-ups. But being able to listen to you, your music and your thoughts about life made me realize that I'm not following my dreams. So, I have started writing a book. yay! I am also a poet now. yay again. I would like you to see you on TV once again Joy! you are so full of life and you bring your character to life as well. I know that you are a part of Dexter now but I haven't got the chance to watch it as yet. Say HI to James coz we miss seeing both of you on TV together.

    All the Best in what ever you do. Your daughter is the sweetest thing.
    Loads of love coming your way.
    Love
    Angie Gonsalves
    Colombo, Sri Lanka
    twitter- @angie_v_g

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  154. Hey are you going to be doing a US Tour anytime soon? A great place would be Orlando Florida!

    Cheers!

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  155. Hey Bethany,
    I don't have much to say, so this won't be a very long post, but I think it is important.
    My advice on being a girl is one simple thing: be happy!
    Do what you love, be who you are, say what you think and tell your opinion.
    Every girl, which does all those things I've mentioned, has automatically an amazing charisma and an overwhelming appearance.

    Actually that's all I wanted to say, so, yes thats it.

    An my question for you is: what do you do to be thoroughly happy?

    I hope to hear from you soon!

    Love,
    Lena

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  156. Hello Bethany!!!!

    I was glad to hear your coming up with a new album, I've always looked forward to your music since hearing your songs in One Tree Hill.

    I was wondering how I can reach you and tell you what's been going on. I'm trying to reach very talented artists, like yourself, to sing this song I've been thinking about. I'm not a singer, just someone who's been through a couple things. I have a message that I'd like to be turned into a lyric, and I picture certain voices singing these lyrics and your the main one. I dont want to be recognized, as I'm not a singer, just someone who came up with this idea, a long shot but an idea. I dont want the fame, nor the money but a great artist to sing this and even come up with lyrics of your own. All I know is I have the message I want to put out there. Sometimes we can relate to lyrics when going through a difficult or happy time in our lives and most of those times, these songs help us move on.

    Please help Joy!
    XOXO

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  157. Hello Bethany Joy Lenz!!!! I have just finished watching all nine amazing seasons of OTH on netflix. So i want to thankyou for your dedication to the show that has truly changed my life and my friends lifes. You are an amazing women and i hope that when i'm older I'll be like you and will hopefully get to meet you one day!keep blogging because i love reading them!
    xoxoxo, your biggest fan jill!

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  158. Hello Joy or should i just simply call you Haley? :) well i'm a 16 years old, Indian who is a huge fan of yours.. You're so beautiful, and you're role in OTH (one tree hill) has inspired me.. Well, i'm in a relationship with this guy for 2years now, and we kinda have this "Naley" thing between us..and yes, i even got pregnant..and he didn't walk away, but stayed with me..although our baby didn't survive; miscarriage.. Haley you are my role model, and i am so glad to share this with you.. And i'm saying this again.. YOU SO ARE BEAUTIFUL.. I never miss an episode of OTH and i still watch it every time on the internet.. I love your songs too, they are amazing... Love them, love you..
    This is all i wanna say i guess..so i'll be writing to you again... Until then, goodbye and keep smiling :)

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  159. Hello Bethany..
    It's so nice to finally get to talk to you.. I'm a huge fan of yours and i think you're beautiful.. I really like the role you played in OTH (One Tree Hill) and you became my role model. I too have an interest in music but there is no one to support me :( can i call you Beth if you don't mind maybe Haley.. hehe. Haley you are fabulous, i just Love you. well i'm a 16 years old girl from India.. You know, looking at you and Nathan "Naley" in OTH, i realise that my relationship is more or less te same. hehe, ive been in a relationship with thgis guy for 2 years and yes i even got pregnant but sadly the baby didnt survive...we are still so in love, crazy about each other.. Haley you really are my Role model. Please write back to me Beth, i'm also in facebook.. My a/c name is Rwr Deiphi Shabong, RWR is my boyfriend's initials ^^ Lve you lots.. XOXO

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  160. hi...dis is priyanka from india..i just want 2 say dat i m big fan of one tree hill..i m 222yrs old..& i need to tell u dis dat after seeing the complete serial, i m finding that lyf is beautiful indeed!

    one tree hill is a cult serial ever.. & i love u :)

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  161. hi joy!!!!how are you??it is so nice that you created a blog and you try to help people!!my name is Evaggelia and i am from Greece! i admire you a lot and i wish i could meet you!you are soo talented and you inspire thousands of people with your work,your music.........!!cheers! i hope to hear from you soon!!♥☺

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  162. Dear Bethany,
    i admire you a lot! i love one tree hill and you!!you are my favorite actress and is so nice that you created this blog!!!!!!!i love your voice, your kindness,....................just be who you are and keep inspiring us!!!!!!☺♥♥

    cheers,
    Evaggelia

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  163. I just wanted to thank you for teaching me so many lessons on OTH. You are truly an amazing person and if i turn out to be half the woman you are I will be blessed. Hope all is well.
    Chelsea

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  164. Hey Joy
    I am a huge fan of you and your character on OTH! I love the show, sucks it ended, My name is Rebecca Dumond, I am from Canada. I would LOVE to meet you, you are a huge role model and inspiration to me, I love your music,and I love to sing I want to become an actress and a singer also.
    Rebecca
    red.dumond@live.ca

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  165. Hey Joy,
    I am a huge fan of you and of your character as Haley on OTH! You are a huge role model and inspiration. I would love to meet one day! I love your music, I want to be a singer and an actor one day.
    please contact me at my email
    red.dumond@live.ca

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  166. Have you answered for at least one comment? I can't find it!

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